Dear Mr. President: Help Us Make Right Something So Wrong

Dear Mr. President: Help Us Make Right Something So Wrong

Thought for the day: This should be my thought for the year & not the day, since it will take much longer to make this dream happen than just a day. In my new children's book, When Bad Things Happen to Children, there is a verse which says, "When bad things happen, we must think hard and long. We'll try to make right of something so wrong." The process of making things right will take effort from people from around the country. Barack Obama has started the process, first by addressing the families & sharing his sadness for the world to see. He then started the next phase by putting in rapid motion, what I hope will be better gun control laws across the nation. However, to make something right of something so wrong will take additional efforts on multiple levels. I decided to write a letter to the president & would love for you to send your versions & suggestions along to him as well. The more parents, teachers & concerned citizens write to their senators, congressmen & the President, the more chance we have to insure that the lives lost in Newtown were not in vain. So here is my letter to the president. Feel free to forward it to anyone you think may be able to help.

Dear Mr. President,
        First, let me introduce myself. My name is Dr. Barbara Lavi. I am a psychologist, licensed in both CT and MA. I began my career in Israel where one of my areas of expertise was helping children & families cope with the perils of war & terrorism. Since returning to the United States, whenever traumatic events occur,  I find my expertise jumps into action like a knee jerk reaction. However, I also know that the impact of trauma does not disappear when the news about the events dies down. I may be the only therapist in the United States who routinely asks new clients how 9/11 impacted on them & their families. I use this information in developing a treatment plan & often find that the events have impacted on clients' current dilemmas.
         The recent tragedy in Newtown sent me into crisis intervention mode right away, since I live & work in Weston CT. I went to corporations impacted by the tragedy in Stamford & Danbury CT. I volunteered to do EMDR with survivors and to speak on radio talk shows on how to help children cope with the horrendous events targeting children. It prompted me to write & offer a free download of a children's book, When Bad Things Happen to Children, with a guide for parents & teachers to help them air their feelings & ask questions about what happened. All of this was my gut reaction to what had occurred. I wanted to give parents & children a sense of control by helping them express their feelings & find ways to do something to help them cope with the tragedy. I thought that I was doing enough to help.
         However, today I am writing to you because I know that what I am doing is not enough. I need your help as do all the parents, teachers & concerned citizens of this great country. I applaud your ability to show your tears & model that it is appropriate for everyone to show their sorrow when bad things happen. I also am encouraged by your promise to make rapid changes in the gun control laws around the nation. However, I am concerned that this too is not enough.
         I congratulate you on hopefully averting the fiscal cliff which was lurking & threatening this country; however there is an educational, mental health cliff that is equally, if not more threatening to our nation. This cliff requires the same kind of concerted, bipartisan effort by senators, congressmen & all our citizens. The tragedies in Newtown, Aurora, Michigan, Columbine & too many others are symptomatic of this invisible cliff. My experience as a psychologist in Israel may offer some ideas to help with these urgent issues.
         In Israel, there is one Ministry of Education which sets the guidelines for the entire nation's school system. Since Israel has been under attack since it's inception, they have had to confront traumatic issues that impact on children head on year round. Home room teachers don't just check attendance. They are also the children's touch point for all social issues that arise. They teach a class called, "Chevrah," which happens a few times a week with the homeroom class (which remains virtually the same through out each of the school experiences, elementary, middle & high school). The best translation for the word "Chevrah" is social studies, but it is more than that. When bad things happen, in the social relationships of the students, in the news or in their homes, there is a built in safety net where the students & teachers are already comfortable talking about tough events. In the USA, when a tragedy occurs, each school reacts, calls in psychologists & counselors who do crisis interventions & then disappear from the school. This is simply not enough.
          In addition, counselors & teachers are burdened with academic testing results & have little time to address the mental & social health of their students. The ratio of students to counselors in our schools must be examined if they are going to be able to preform their jobs and help children cope with family, social as well as academic pressures. In Florida, this concern is being addressed by considering new legislation. Republican State Sen. Nancy Detert filed a bill this week that would require most of the state’s school districts to hire more guidance counselors, based on the number of students at each school. State Senator Detert says, “We don’t have enough guidance counselors to deal with the personal problems of the kids, the family problems at home — let alone helping them get into college.” The same problem exists across the nation.
           Another pressing problem that is symptomatic of the social, mental health cliff is that bullying is running rampant in our schools. Although most school administrators will say they are handling the problem with zero tolerance policies, not only are these policies ineffective in treating the problem, they may also be exacerbating it. Like disgruntled employees who come back to the workplace where they have been fired & do harm to their old boss or co-workers, students expelled from school may become future attackers. Schools need ongoing, comprehensive programs that include training for parents, teachers & the broader community. These programs must help the bullies and the victims if we are to improve the situation in our society.
           Another major area that needs to be addressed is access to care and early intervention for mentally ill children and young adults. Currently, parents of special needs students must fight for the therapeutic programs for their children due to budgetary constraints.  NAMI, the National Alliance on Mental Illness, the nation’s largest grassroots organization dedicated to building better lives for the millions of Americans affected by mental illness reports that, "Half of all chronic serious mental illness begins by age 14, three-quarters by age 24. Despite effective treatment, most youth go without. Screening, assessment and early intervention of mental health conditions for children and youth should be an integral part of health care delivery systems." There are far too few home and community based services for mentally ill adults around the country. By under serving this population, we may be spawning the increase in acts of violence by the mentally ill in our nation. Perhaps with ObamaCare some of the mental health services of the special needs students and adults will be better addressed.
           Television, movies & violent video games also play a part in the increase in violent behaviors. Eugene V Beresin, M.D., Director of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry Residency Training at the Massachusetts General Hospital and McLean Hospital, addresses the impact of violence in the media on children and adolescents. He reports that, "The typical American child will view more than 200,000 acts of violence, including more than 16,000 murders before age 18. Television programs display 812 violent acts per hour; children's programming, particularly cartoons, displays up to 20 violent acts hourly." He voices concern about the impact of such violence on young children who not only are taught that violence is a "cool" means of conflict resolution, but also desensitized to violence seeing it, "as a fact of life and, over time, lose their ability to empathize with both the victim and the victimizer."
             Freedom of speech did not include media representing terror in more & more realistic ways to highly suggestible children or mentally ill adults, which make violence seem unreal or an acceptable path to follow when angry. When I spoke with young adults in CT following the attacks, many of them said, things like, "I'm fine. I'm used to these kind of things, like 9/11." We must not let our youth become numb to these kinds of assaults on human beings.
           As the President of our country, I call on you lead our country to address each of these important issues. Hopefully, together we will develop laws, guidelines, private sector programs that can help fund innovative programs to address the educational, mental health cliff. There are many wonderful programs,  however, each community is trying to reinvent the wheel leading to wasted energy & resources. By bringing together, educators, psychologists, psychiatrists, businessmen, Nonprofit organizations, lawyers, philanthropists, law makers, creative thought leaders to come up with programs & guidelines, hopefully, we will find ways to make right of something so wrong & not let any more innocent lives be lost in vain.
                              Respectfully,
                                   Barbara Lavi, PsyD

When Bad Things Happen to Children: Helping Children Process Traumatic Events

As Children in Newtown Return to School a New Children's Book to Help Parents, Teachers & Children

Thought for the Day: Those of you following my blog know that I have been working with families in Connecticut impacted by both Hurricane Sandy & the tragedy at the Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown CT. I have appeared on radio shows (Sandy Hook on Dec. 17, 2012 on The Bachelor Pad & Hurricane Sandy on 11/21/2012 live on "Paying It Forward" with Josephine Geraci) in response to questions about how parents can help their children deal with traumatic events. It is an area of expertise that I have had throughout my career & use whenever the need arises. It is important for us to remember that we all have been impacted. Even those of us who do not live in Newtown, or on the east coast where Hurricane Sandy left devastation in her path, have been traumatized by these events. Television & newspapers bring the images home instantaneously. Teachers & parents have been crying around the nation (& around the world) in reaction to the attack in Newtown (The memorial pictures are heartbreaking). Children, even when we try to shield them from the news, see & hear things about these events & need the help & guidance from the adults who care for them. Our lives go on & we are surely not as effected as those directly harmed by the tragedies, but it helps to talk about our feelings & help children know that we will do whatever we can to keep them safe. I hope you will download the book & use it as a way to start these difficult but important conversations with your children. The book offers some ways to take action with your children & feel more in control as well. Here is a press release about the book, When Bad Things Happen to Children. Please share this with parents, teachers & counselors who could use it with the children in their care.
      As always, I would love to hear your thoughts & reactions to this post. If you use the book with your children, please share some of the discussions & art work that it inspires.

Press Release:

-->Dr. Barbara Lavi, psychologist and trauma specialist, offers free e-book, When Bad Things Happen to Children, in response to the Tragedy at Sandy Hook ElementarySchool   

        Responding to the pressing need to help their children across the country cope with the news of the tragedy at the Sandy Hook Elementary School, Dr. Barbara Lavi and Lee Delzingo prepared a children’s book, When Bad Things Happen to Children. The book is available to download for free at: www.WakeUpAndDreamChallenge.com 

         Dr. Lavi, licensed psychologist, author and trauma expert has been helping families deal with trauma for many years. She reports that she began as, “a Master’s student in clinical child psychology while living in Israel during the Yom Kippur.” When the tragedy occurred in Connecticut, she knew parents and children would need help She has appeared on talk shows and worked with clients in Connecticut. Since the event targeted children, as an author and a psychologist, “I felt compelled to write a book to help as quickly as possible.”

          The book was written in collaboration with her daughter, Lee Delzingo. Since Lee is completing her Master’s degree in Special Education, works in an elementary school, and is the mother of a 7 year-old daughter and 10 year-old son, Dr. Lavi asked her to help with the project. Some of the touching conversations Lee had with her children have been included in this book.

        The book, a series of verses in a poem, is geared towards elementary school children. It was designed for parents, teachers and counselors to read with children. Since talking about traumatic events helps process them, it can be used as a tool to help start conversations about the recent tragedy. Parents and teachers may choose to work on it one verse at a time over several days. Adults can set the pace they feel is appropriate for the age and maturity level of the specific children they are helping. There is blank space on every page where children can be encouraged to write and/or draw to express their thoughts and feelings about what has transpired.

        Parents are encouraged to read through the entire poem and the annotated Parents’ & Teachers’ Guide before reading it with children. If any of the verses do not seem suited to a child, the adult can leave them out. As adults read the book with children, they can decide which verses to share. There is also a list of additional resources to help children understand and cope with death and loss.

          Dr. Lavi and Lee Delzingo hope this will help parents and educators deal with the difficult task of helping children cope with the most recent traumatic event and other trauma as well. They encourage readers to share it with family, friends and other educators.

Dr. Lavi can be contacted via her website: www.WakeUpAndDreamChallenge.com

Happy 1st Birthday to WakeUpAndDreamCatalyst.Blogspot.com

Thank You for a Great 1st Year  WakeUpDreamCatalyst.blogspot.com Thought for the Day: It is hard to believe that it has been almost a year, since I started this blog! As I post my last blog for 2012, it makes sense to look back over the year that was. There have been triumphs & heartaches. I have been honored to share my thoughts & feelings with you. It is hard to believe that on January 4th it will be the anniversary of the inauguration of this blog. My first post: Don't Wait for Opportunity to Knock, Just Open the Door & Find Her, had just 42 page views. The blog has come a long way since then. There have been almost 20,000 page views! It seems fitting to review the top ten posts of 2012. Here they are in order of my fan's preferences: # 1 The Hunger Games Parenting Nightmare or Opportunity
# 2 Cyberbullying Facebook App: Like or Ban?
# 3 Can Self Help Books Really Help?
# 4 Part IV: Help Me Start A Gratitude Project Deep in the Heart of Texas
# 5 Mother's Day Part III: If My Mother, Grandmother & I Ruled the World
# 6 Over the Rainbow Deep In the Heart of Texas
# 7 It Takes A Cell Phone To Raise A Child
# 8 Every Expert Was Once A Beginner
# 9 What Do Michelle Obama & Book Publishing Have in Common?
# 10 What Do You Get When You Combine Corporate Sponsors, NPOs, Academics & Entrepreneurs?  The # 1 Post: The Hunger Games Parenting Nightmare or Opportunity has had close to 2000 page views! I almost skipped the movie due to all the hype about it & then realized that it was an important film for parents & teens to see. I have enjoyed writing this blog more than I could have imagined. It has given me a place to share my dreams, encourage you & support multiple causes from anti-bullying campaigns to registering a cell phone to help save lives. I hope I have inspired you not only to dream, but also to act upon your dreams & start moving towards them. Here are a few of the photos that I also enjoyed learning to make for the blog: From the Dream On Wheels Tour Series From The Next Big Thing Blog Hop From The DreamBusters Series Thanksgiving Tips Learn to Fall to Learn to Stand Tall Spotlight on Fears Thank you all for reading & sharing your comments. I look forward to hearing from you & sharing with you in 2013 & beyond! Happy New Year!          Barbara

5 Ways to Give New Meaning to a Blue Christmas

Thought for the Day: This holiday season is challenging for everyone. This week, like many psychologists nationwide,  I have been doing critical incident work with people in Connecticut impacted by the tragedy in Newtown CT. Whether people knew someone who lost a friend or family member or not, people are struggling with how to speak with their children, cope with & accept that they are grieving. Many people are not feeling like celebrating the holidays this year, which led to this post. Although I called these ways to give new meaning to a "Blue Christmas" they apply to whatever holiday you celebrate. Here are a few ways to find new meaning during this blue holiday season.

  

One of many memorials in Newtown CT

  1) Accept your feelings as part of the normal human reaction to a tragic event.
     Yesterday, I counseled a woman in Danbury CT who had decided not to celebrate Christmas this year. She did not know anyone who was directly impacted by the tragedy but was visibly shaken fighting back tears since she was at work. Like many of the people I have met with this week, she felt a form of "survivor's guilt." In light of the anguish that we can only imagine that the families who lost a loved one are experiencing, people feel that they should not be feeling the grief they are experiencing. What I have been telling people is that their feelings, tears, anger, numbness, sorrow are normal reactions to the trauma. Feelings are not right or wrong, they just are. They act like the safety valve on a pressure cooker to let off steam & keep the pressure cooker from exploding. Your emotions are a sign that you are a caring human being struggling with an inhumane event.


      2) Create a memorial ceremony as you begin your family's event
      There are multiple ways to take some time before celebrations begin to acknowledge those lost in this tragedy. A moment of silence, a candle lighting, a prayer, a walk by the beach, or writing & sending condolence cards together with your family and friends can help you acknowledge that this holiday is different from the past. There is a digital card that is being sent which has over 2 million signatures worldwide. If you wish to send an original paper condolence card or drawing prepared with your family, here is the address:  
                Messages of Condolence for Newtown
                P.O. Box 3700
                Newtown, CT 06470
       3) Start working to prevent future tragedies
       Although we cannot promise our children that there will never be other tragedies, there are natural tragedies & bad things do happen in life. What we can do is get involved in projects that will address the loopholes that compromise our safety. There are a multitude of ways to get involved in finding the solutions to a number of challenges facing our nation. You can write to your senators & congressmen about these & other issues: 1) reforming gun control laws; 2) advocate for increased mental health resources for children & adults with serious mental illness; 3) investigate ways to reduce violence on TV, movies & video games, especially those aimed at children; and 4) advocate for comprehensive year round educational programs that work towards tolerance & a reduction of bullying in our schools & society. In addition to writing campaigns, get involved in your community's efforts to develop programs that will increase safety in our schools & neighborhoods. Depending on the ages of your children, get them involved in the discussion & activities as well.
        4) Volunteer with people less fortunate than you
         Start a new family tradition and consider volunteering. You could sign up to serve food at a homeless shelter or visit an old folks home or hospital. Bring gifts to brighten the holiday for someone who is struggling. In addition to giving gifts to your family,  have all the members of your family bring something to donate to a charity. With your children go through their toys & clothes to find things that they no longer use that is in good condition & take it to a donation center before the holiday. (Take a look at some of the nonprofits benefiting from my book for ideas of organizations that could use your help.)
         5) As hard as it is to rejoice, carrying on is reaffirming life & not allowing terror or madness to destroy what is good in the world
         It is important to bring routines and structure back into our lives, especially for children to regain a sense of safety & trust in human beings. In the Diary of Anne Frank we learned of how a family in hiding from the Nazi terrorist regime tried to keep a semblance of normalcy, including celebrations of holidays. Although her life was cut short, she lives on in the hearts of millions who have read her diary or seen the play based on her diary.  Her message has been heard around the world. Her words have bearing today as we struggle with finding the strength to rejoice following such an unthinkable tragedy. We must help our children regain trust in mankind as Anne Frank did:
Despite everything, I believe that people are really good at heart.
Anne Frank

          I hope these ideas will help you have a positive holiday experience with renewed resolve to make the world a better, safer, more peaceful place for all.

                 

Fiscal Cliff Versus Mental Health Educational Cliff

Thought for the day: As the country struggles with the tragedy in Newtown CT the debate about the fiscal cliff has been pushed to the background. One can only hope that the events will keep the physical & emotional health & well-being of our children in the foreground. Hopefully we will all take a long hard look at how well we are doing in caring for the mentally ill in our society. Are we teaching our children to treat one another with respect & without prejudice? Are we jeopardizing the safety of our children while protecting adults' rights to bear arms? Were our forefathers expecting people to carry semi-automatic guns?

We cannot bring back the innocent lives lost, but we can take action to try to prevent similar attacks from occurring. On Sunday I saw a play called Falling in NYC. It is a powerful depiction of the complex issues a family is forced to deal with while raising an 18 year old son who is on the spectrum of autism. Although each child suffering from severe autism to mild asperger's syndrom is different, they raise serious questions which were even more striking in light of the Newtown tragedy. What happens to children when they "age out" of the system & families cannot find appropriate supervised living situations? The facts surrounding the shooter's history & his diagnosis are not clear yet, however, this is not the first time that someone who was potentially dangerous slipped through the cracks & caused senseless loss of life. Today, a Huffington Post article raised the question: Did Fear Of Being Committed Lead To Sandy Hook Elementary Shooting?  If you are near NYC, I urge you to see the play, Falling, before it closes at the end of this month to understand the struggles of raising a disturbed adult in a society that does not have enough adequate resources to help them.

Schools across the country are also struggling with budgetary cuts & focusing on academic achievement while neglecting social & emotional health issues. Our children are dealing with bullying & prejudice (I have written extensively in previous posts about bullying in our schools.) which can lead to disgruntled angry responses among children who become loners & outcasts among their peers. All too often school systems ignore or deny the existence of bullying or they have one time programs to remedy the problems. Short term interventions following the suicide of a bullied student or death of a student due to drunken driving, is not enough to combat the problems facing our children. Parents need to advocate for ongoing comprehensive programs that work with both the bullies and the children who have been the targets of bullies. 

Merchants, film makers & television producers must also strive to use restraint & self-censorship when it comes to the marketing of violent video games, movies & TV shows. Do our children need to be encouraged to shoot realistic targets with high powered video rifles? Psychological research documents the negative effects of such games & movies on normal children.  Aimee Tompkins summarized The Psychological Effects of Violent  Media on Children  ironically, on December 14, 2003 & found that: "The American Psychological Association says there are three major effects of watching violence in the media (i.e.: video games/television) children may become less sensitive to the pain and suffering of others, children may be more fearful of the world around them, and children may be more likely to behave in aggressive or hurtful ways toward others." The impact on the mentally ill child or adult is simply multiplied. As parents & responsible citizens, let the game manufacturers & media know that you want them to curtail & discontinue such games & reduce the amount of explicit violence in the media.

The Huffington Post report this morning that Walmart Guns Out Of Stock Following Newtown Massacre is extremely disturbing. How many more homes will now have weapons within reach of children & potentially violent disturbed individuals? We must make sure that our representatives in Washington take this alarming trend to stockpile weapons in their deliberations. Yesterday, a client told me that at gun ranges there are lockers to store arms. Perhaps that is a way to keep them away from the hands of those who could use them to do harm. 

It seems like years ago, but on November 2nd I wrote a Post called: Whether the Glass is 1/2 Empty or Half Full, Make the Most With What You Have Left. Today, I am writing about what to do when the glass is shattered. The glass was shattered last Friday & we are all struggling to glue the pieces back together & find our way back to sanity to regain trust in our society's ability to protect our rights for life, liberty & the pursuit of happiness.  

These are not easy problems to resolve. They are complex & the solutions will not be quick or easy; however we must make sure they are addressed & that the discussions continue when the media stops reporting about the tragedy. Although our hearts are heavy this holiday season, I encourage you to continue to dream of & work for "Peace on earth, good will toward men." Regardless of your religious affiliation, we all need & can be inspired by the words & music which have additional significance this year. I will never think of the song Rock of Ages in the same way as when I heard the words this year that say: "And your strength broke their swords, when our own strength failed us." Although we may feel that alone our strength may fail us, together, we must find strength to believe in miracles & take action to make them happen. By voicing our concerns & searching for creative solutions to the challenges we face, out of this tragedy, may we find the strength to build a better safer world.

Please share your comments, thoughts & ideas of ways to work together to solve these challenges.

Newtown: What Can Parents Do When They Are At A Loss For Words??

Thought for the Day: As the cold hard facts of the tragedy in Newtown CT are revealed on the news, the pictures are heartbreaking.  We all struggle to make sense of a senseless crime against defenseless children & teachers. There are more questions than answers swirling in everyone's heads. Some of the questions may never be answered. In this day & age with television's instantaneous reports, when trauma strikes we are all traumatized. Parents watch horrified & do not know what to say to their children. Today I will share some thoughts & coping skills, but I will also raise tough questions & would like to hear your thoughts as well. (It is a longer post, but bear with me & make sure you read the questions at the end.)

I became a reluctant expert on helping children & families deal with trauma when I was a young psychology student working on my Master's thesis in Israel when the Yom Kippur War broke out. I was also a young parent of two whose husband was in the reserves for close to a year. Hundreds of school children lost their fathers in reserve units like my husband's in the Sinai. My professor, Dr. Esther Halpern, was also my adviser on my Master's Thesis. She encouraged me to focus my thesis on ways to help children cope with war, father absence & the death of a parent during war.

I remember my concern about doing research on the subject. How could I ask children who had recently lost their fathers about how they felt about their father's death & then disappear from their lives?  She told me that as a psychologist & I would need to talk to children & adults about all kinds of difficult issues in their lives & that if a child needed additional help we would let the teachers know. She also asked if I had ever spoken to a teacher or even a stranger who had touched my life & helped me even though we only spoke once. I will never forget how grateful & surprised those children were that I asked them about their fathers. They told me that most people avoided talking to them about their fathers at all. I believe the interviews helped those children cope with their loss.

It is far more pleasant to work with people on reaching for their dreams, however, there is a time & a place for everything. Although I am a pacifist, the lessons I learned about disasters & war, have been used each time tragedy rears it's head. When it occurs,  I know I can help people through the worst of times. I am a strong believer in finding words & other ways to help people cope with loss & tragedy. I may be the only psychologist in the USA who asks every new client how they were impacted by 9/11 & the wars that have followed, but I know that the impact of trauma can be felt many years later.

Elementary School & Gunman are words we don't expect to see in the same sentence

No matter how many times I have helped people in the midst of a tragedy, I too am at first blindsided by feelings of terror, anger, sorrow, shock & disbelief. Although words fail us as adults, we must find the strength to help one another & our children through the tragedy.  When words fail us, being there, holding one another, saying that we do not know what to say is important, both for the mourners & for their supporters. We must find ways to express our feelings, since we cannot cope with our feelings if we do not know what they are.

On Friday, I was called by Cigna EAP & asked to help  employees working at a corporation in Stamford who live in Newtown. I rescheduled my clients & will be there Monday & Tuesday. Late last night a journalist, LA Bachelor , who lives in North Carolina, but was raised in Connecticut, called & asked me to come on his radio show to address what parents can do to help their children following this tragedy. We spoke at length & I look forward to helping his listeners on Monday 6-8 PM. Just two weeks ago I was speaking on another radio show helping parents struggling with the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy. Given my experience, stepping up to the plate & speaking or volunteering to help using my expertise, is one of my coping mechanisms. You too can find ways to help that will help the survivors & help you at the same time. (I will post the information about the radio show, where you can call in questions as well.) (Post a comment & your e-mail if you would like to be informed about the show.)

Those of you who have been reading my posts know that volunteerism & activism is something that I encourage & support. It is too soon for solutions, but it is important to ask the tough questions & that we all advocate to make changes that will help prevent tragedies like Newtown from happening. Let your children know that you will be searching for answers, asking the questions of your leaders, & fighting for programs that will help.

I saw the movie Lincoln last night & was struck by the parallels between President Lincoln's challenges facing the tragedy of the Civil War & President Obama fighting tears as he consoled our nation following the tragedy in Newtown. We as citizens, parents & grandparents need to advocate for our leaders to help lead our country to find ways to prevent the senseless attacks on innocent people in schools, churches, & movie theaters.

We are all hearing about the fiscal crisis. Are we ignoring the mental health & emotional crisis that is plaguing our society? Are we placing too much emphasis on grades & academic achievement & ignoring the emotional well being of our children? Are we expecting knee jerk responses & band-aid solutions to work following tragedies when long term ongoing comprehensive programs are what's needed? The shooter in Newtown was around 10 years old when 9/11 occurred. In the news they are now saying that he had Asperger's syndrome or a personality disorder. How do trauma like 9/11 & the constant barrage of movies, video games & news coverage of violence impact on all children but in particular on those with emotional issues? As parents, you can demand more comprehensive crisis prevention programs to address all kinds of issues from bullying to learning differences, to prejudice & intolerance of differences. You can encourage the gun control debate about your children's rights for life, liberty & the pursuit of happiness versus the right of citizens' to bear arms including semi-automatic weapons.

Please feel free to comment & share your thoughts.

Take The New Year's Resolution Challenge

                                              This Year Take The New Year's Resolution Challenge Instead!                                                                                       Photo From Facebook.com

Thought for the Day: As 2012 draws toward a close, how many of you made New Year's resolutions last year like the list on the photo above? How many of those resolutions have you kept true to & actually accomplished? How many have fallen by the wayside or been forgotten completely? Are you looking for New Year's resolutions that will really work & help you improve your life significantly? I decided to challenge you to try an alternative to New Year's resolutions. I am so confident that it will work that I will give a free 1/2 hour phone consult to anyone who buys the book between now & January 31, 2013. Read on to see how & why it will work & why I am suggesting that you try it this year.

     I'd like to invite you to read my book & start your Dreamer’s Education. When you follow the directions on how to enhance your DQ (Dream Quotient) & develop your personal DPS (Dream Positioning System) you will learn to to navigate your way to a dream filled life. If you are looking for New Year’s resolutions that can last a lifetime,  make a difference in your life & help the world, the Wake Up and dream Challenge will show you how.

    The book will teach you what former clients, like L.D. learned :

            “Life is tough. It presents challenges all of the time. My first scary challenge that knocked me down was when I got Multiple Sclerosis in 1993. After addressing the physiologic,al portion, many fears and irrational behavior developed. Because of Dr. Lavi, and my time as her patient, I was able to get back on track and enjoy my life despite knowing I would have MS the rest of my life and would need to work hard to manage and control it. What Dr. Lavi didn’t know until now, is that she helped me again, when I faced stage-3 cancer years later. Her guidance and effective dream-planning ideas stayed with me all these years and helped me again through an even more frightening time of horrific cancer treatments. I would l not be who I am today without her help and guidance." L.D.

photo from perfectbucketlist.tumblr.com

         The challenge presented in the book is on multiple levels. Every reader who buys the book, is helping themselves meet & overcome their personal challenges & create a life filled with their passions & dreams. The book will give you a step by step guide to chart your way using the DPS or Dream Positioning System. Once programmed your DPS will go onto automatic pilot helping you move towards your dream destinations, like the GPS in your car until you reprogram it.
      If you take the challenge, you are also joining a larger challenge to help change the world. Dr. Lavi is donating 1/2 of the profits from every book sold to one of the amazing “dream nonprofits” featured in the book. They are helping people from all parts of the country reach their dreams despite all kinds of obstacles. 
     Here are stories & videos about five of the programs. One of the nonprofits, Higher Ground  helps couples  like Julio & Maria, whose story is included in the book. Julio is a recovering war hero, blinded during battle, who spent a week with Maria in an intensive recreational therapy program. The week was followed by a 3 year follow up to make sure their lives were changed:

     "Six months after joining the HG family, Julio called the staff. He was so excited that he could barely contain himself. “I just got back from seeing Maria and the kids. No one came to pick me up! I left the hospital, went to the train station, walked to the house, and surprised Maria at the door. I DID IT ALL BY MYSELF!” The HG staff was brought to tears when Julio said, “You have heard of the snowball effect? I believe that sometimes that snowball can defy gravity and gain momentum and mass as it rolls uphill. My snowball started on top of a mountain in Idaho, followed me home to Florida, through blind rehab, and will be with me when I stand next to my wife at the altar.”

      Elimination of Prejudice helps college students fight prejudice on colleges across the USA & Canada. It has helped fight prejudice since 1895. The Blind Judo Foundation  enhances blind athletes' self-confidence & helps them reach for their dreams (See clip about one of their participants above). Syd Mandlebaum founded Rock & Wrap It Up, an organization that wraps up unused food from sports venues, rock concerts & movie sets. They then distribute it to shelters, so that they can focus on rehabilitation programs for the homeless.  Boaz & Ruth rehabilitates ex-convicts & people who have lost the will to live. Take a look at a video about one of their graduates & the Sunny Days thrift Shop operated by graduates (See clip above). To read about the other 16 nonprofit organizations, go to www.WakeUpAndDreamChallenge.com.

     The book is available on kindle on Amazon.com: http://www.amazon.com/The-Wake-Dream-Challenge-ebook/dp/B008VEUOIA for $9.95. There is one version for each nonprofit, enter the name of the nonprofit & The Wake Up and Dream Challenge to purchase the right version & donate to the charity of your choice or in print ($26.00) on Kiwi Publishers (the print version is available for arrival prior to Christmas).
     To help you reach your dreams, I am offering a 1/2 hour free phone consult to anyone who purchases the book between now & January 31, 3013. If you are looking for a way to make your New Year's resolutions work once & for all take my New Years' Resolution Challenge. You can use your 1/2 hour free consult while you develop your DPS (Dream Positioning System) or at any time in the future.