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Showing posts with label #Positivepsychology. Show all posts
Showing posts with label #Positivepsychology. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

The Wake Up and Dream Catalyst: The Power of One Positive Thought


           
Here's another shared post from my CoupleTime.net blog, where I share simple easy recipes to enhance your relationships.
     Today's recipe is slightly different. Current research in psychology has proven that resilient people tend to be positive thinkers. They tend to see the glass half full rather than half empty. One way to fill that glass is to practice thinking positive thoughts, one small thought at a time. Read on for the recipe...

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Motivational Mondays: Yes You Can and Here's How


Thought for the Day: Political campaign slogans can make or break an election. The "Yes We Can" campaign and poster may have been the single most influential element in Barack Obama's presidential victory. It captured the attention of a nation weary of inaction and searching for hope for a better future. Whether the nation has seen the progress that they had hoped for is another question. In fact, the slogan may have in some ways backfired. People may have expected change to happen quickly.

As a psychologist, I know that change takes time. Although psychotherapy empowers people to overcome adversity and make changes in their lives, they need to be patient. Change takes hard work and perseverance if it is to become real and lasting. In a society which thrives on fast food restaurants, smart phones and computers with immediate answers at our fingertips, many people have lost hope on the political arena and "Yes We Can," may now feel like an empty promise. History and time will tell whether actual changes began to occur during this presidency. However, I can help you and clients with challenges facilitate change in their lives and the slogan for you to remember is: "Yes You Can."

Here's some advice on how you can, based on things I have learned over the years in my clinical practice...

Thursday, July 24, 2014

Thursday's Psychology Trivia: What's the Unhappiest City in The USA & Why?

Thought for the Day: Long before the trend in positive psychology, I have always been fascinated in what leads to positive outcomes for people who have suffered from difficult life circumstances. My Master's thesis looked at what helped children cope with war, father absence and loss of a parent during war. At the time, psychology was entirely focused what causes psychopathology. Mine was one of the few studies which tried to figure out what leads to mental health. In recent years others have followed suit and today's psychology trivia question looks at a recent study's findings on how where we live impacts on our happiness. Here's the question:
   The most unhappy city in the United States is:

        a) Detroit MI
        b) Las Vegas NV
        c) Richmond VA
        d) New York NY 
        e) Pittsburg PA

What do you think, which of the cites above is the unhappiest in the United States?





Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom: Does the Pursuit of Happiness Lead to Unhappiness?


Thought for the Day: Today's Words of Wisdom came from answering a question on HealthTap. The question was: Do any docs think the pursuit of happiness brings about unhappiness? For those of you new to my blog, on HealthTap responses to questions are limited to 400 characters. Given the broad nature of the question, this one was challenging, but it lead me to create the quote you see in the image above: 
"The pursuit of happiness does not lead to unhappiness. The pursuit of unrealistic expectations leads to unhappiness."

Here's how I put it in 400 characters...

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Tuesday's Psychology Tip: Retrain Your Brain To Be More Positive


Thought for the Day: On Tuesday's I post Psychology Tips. Often, I start by sharing a 100 character Tip I have shared on HealthTap. Today I wrote a new one and will elaborate a bit on it here. The tip is on how to retrain your brain to be more positive. Current research indicates that retraining your brain can impact on both your emotional and physical health, as well as increase the length of your life. Here's the tip and then some...




Tuesday, October 1, 2013

Tuesday's Psychology Trivia: Marital Bliss: When Are Married Couples Happiest?


Thought for the Day: It's Tuesday & time for the Psychology Trivia Question. What do you think is the right answer & why? Here's the question:

     When are married couples happiest? 
             
         a) 1 year after they get married
         b) 7 years after they get married
         c) 3 years after they get married
         d) 2 years after they get married
         e) 40 years after they get married

Although you may think it is before they get married, that is not the answer. Come back on Thursday for the answer.

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Thursday's Psychology Trivia Answer: Can Faking Happiness Help Fight Depression?




Thought for the Day: It's Thursday & time for an answer to Tuesday's Psychology Trivia Question: Can pretending you are happy help fight depression? When I wrote the trivia question, I told the story of how I responded to someone on HealthTap’s question about whether his depression & monotone voice on the phone might be hurting his family business. My answer to him included the suggestion that he practice an upbeat phone voice for work. I also told him that it might help him fight the depression. My advice was prompted from various positive psychology studies that have found that a positive attitude can help reduce depression. However, I also knew that the solution to depression is far more complex than smiling more.

    I also wanted to hear from my readers, since I knew you would have thoughts & experiences that might help others dealing with similar issues. I am excited to share some of the responses that people shared here & on other social media sites in response to this non-trivial “trivia” question.

     Bill Brayman’s, a connection of mine on G+, first wrote: "Oh for sure, putting oneself on a program of personal & social positivity will result in less depression & more joy. Lot's of evidence in the positive psychology movement to support this. Certainly deep rooted depression is very tough to struggle against, but I'm certain anyone can make great improvements following a positive program." From the positive psychology world’s & books like Happy for No Reason’s
perspective simplistic prescriptions could turn one’s life around.
 
       Malika Bourne, one of the followers of this blog, raised some serious questions about pretending to be happy. She shared a story about a client she worked with as a nurse. Her client “was very depressed at home & made life miserable for his family.” She escorted him to the doctor every week where he told jokes & acted upbeat. The doctor, a resident, bought into his "happy-go -lucky" act. After months of sitting quietly at the appointments, Malika finally felt compelled to share her observations. The client said, "Well, you know you have to make other people have a good day." In reality, he was in denial that he had a problem. (His depression was related to a head injury.) The doctor then realized that the man “needed more help than what he was getting."


      Plucky Parenting on  G+  comment concurs with Malika’s,  she wrote that "a smile can certainly assist in helping you feel better.  If the underlying problem is not addressed though the depression will continue & no amount of smiling will fix what is truly wrong!"

     One of my connections on LinkedIn, Cesar Vieira, raised questions about depression from the physiological perspective. If depression is a biologically based illness,  like diabetes, which many professionals believe, his view that pretending will not reduce depression may be accurate. He wrote, “in a way I actually think that would lead to split personalities. Possibly also result in deeper depression due to the build up of unhappiness during pretense periods. At the end of the day, pretending does not alter the mechanisms activated in the body when unhappy, it could happen but I find it unlikely.”
       My G+ friend Bill Brayman added another perspective yesterday, after he read an article called Depression's Evolutionary Roots,  in The Scientific American. The article’s authors, , suggest that "depression is not a malfunction, but a mental adaptation that brings certain cognitive advantages." They propose that "depression is nature’s way of telling you that you’ve got complex social problems that the mind is intent on solving." The goal of many types of therapy is to encourage & examine depressive thoughts instead of trying to stop them (as long as the person is safe). In addition, many therapists focus on & try to help people solve the problems that have triggered their depression in the first place. This would be similar to some of the Freudian theories of defense mechanisms. Depression could be seen as a coping mechanism, perhaps that when overused stops being productive.
     So, you may be wondering, what is the answer to the trivia question? From positive psychology’s point of view, pretending may help. If depression is biologically based, pretending to be happy won’t help but it may also hinder the person’s ability to cope with depression. The evolutionary school of thought would also find pretending to be happy as a mistake, since it would make the person avoid our brain’s innate mechanism designed to help us cope with stress.
     My answer to the question is that depression is a complex phenomenon. The solutions, therefore,  are complex as well. Sometimes, simple positive psychology interventions will help get someone unstuck  & enable them to try out more positive ways of coping with their problems. Not as a denial of the issues, but as an adjunct to other kinds of therapy. Hence, the man from HealthTap would surely need to continue working in therapy on the issues that have led to his long standing depression. Having better phone conversations with his prospective clients could lead to more sales. More sales could enhance his self esteem & increase his feelings of self worth. On the other hand, examining the roots of his depression in therapy would be necessary as well. In addition, not all depressions are the same. Some are more reactive, some seem to be more biological in origin. The more biologically based types of depression, which often run in families, have a greater risk of suicide, making medications a necessary element in the treatment. Sometimes, without medication, the person simply cannot address the issues in therapy at all.
     Thanks for all your thoughtful comments, I hope you will continue sharing your thoughts on this & other posts in the future. I hope this has shed some light on the subject & some of the therapeutic interventions available for you or those you know who are struggling with depression.

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Throwback Wednesday: Words of Wisdom by Dr. Seuss and Dr. Lavi

Thought for the Day: Here's an older post from my Wednesday's Words of Wisdom Series. It connects to the trivia question I will be answering tomorrow, but only looks at one angle to the complex question I asked about whether pretending to be happy can help fight depression.  Here's what I wrote a while back:

Thought of the Day: In Wednesday's Words of Wisdom I have brought quotes from great psychologists, psychiatrists & teachers. Today's quote comes from a great artist & author of 45 children's books who has inspired generations of children (& their parents) with humor, creativity & a genuine desire to make the world a more caring peaceful place. 
Born Theodor Seuss Geisel in 1904, very few people know his real name. Geisel is known around the world as Dr. Seuss. He adopted the name Dr. Seuss in his early career as an undergraduate student at Dartmouth University. Although he began a graduate degree at Oxford University, he dropped out & pursued cartooning full time.  His 1st book was rejected by 27 publishers before it was accepted; it was not long before he became an acclaimed children's author.  His list of best selling books, including The Cat in the Hat & Green Eggs and Ham, have been translated into more than twenty languages & over 200 million copies have been sold around the world.
It is an understatement to say that Dr. Seuss' books have made a lasting impression on many generations around the world. His unique, creative illustrations, whacky rhymes & simple words of wisdom are read & recited repeatedly not only in homes, but also on TV, ia Broadway musical & movie renditions of his work. From children books, quotes, to controversial adult books, such as The Butter Battle Book, his messages resonate loud & clear. 
Although I love this quote by Dr. Seuss, "Don’t cry because it’s over but smile because it happened,” I feel a need to change it a bit. Instead I would say: "Cry because its over until you can smile because it happened." Encouraging people to let themselves cry when they are grieving is important. By teaching our children & ourselves that crying is a healthy way to release our darker emotions, we all can make room eventually for the brighter feelings of joy & gratitude when we remember what we have lost.
Although Dr. Seuss passed away in 1991, his memory will live on with his treasure trove of books & illustrations which will bring smiles to all who read his work.

Photos:
Top Right: From Wikipedia Commons {{Information |Source=Library of Congress Prints and Photographs Division. New York World-Telegram and the Sun Newspaper Photograph Collection. http://hdl.loc.gov/loc.pnp/cph.3c16956 |Description= Ted Geisel (Dr. Seuss) half-length portrait, seated at  photo 2

Bottom Left : FlickrCC.com  'Green Eggs and Ham' http-/www.flickr.com/photos/92382806@N00/422005531
Bottom Middle: FlickrCC.com 'Happy Birthday Dr. Seuss' http-/www.flickr.com/photos/8489692@N03/4400664151
Bottom Right: FlickrCC.com 'DSC_2174' http-/www.flickr.com/photos/51035747113@N01/10920509

Friday, September 6, 2013

Friday's Fabulous Finds: Yelling Vs. Physical Punishment. Think Positive, Psychotherapy Vs. Drugs & Teaching Heroism


Thought for the Day: Somehow Friday has slipped away, but here are four fabulous finds from this week. There is an interesting study which found that the impact of yelling at teens is similar to physical punishment. A video on a study which shows how quickly thinking positive thoughts about yourself can improve your mood. Did you know that even though there has been a rise in psycho-pharmological treatment, that most people prefer psychotherapy to drug therapy for depression and anxiety? The third stdy explains this phenomenon. Finally, an interesting program that teaches youth to become heroes. Hope you like these finds and have a wonderful weekend.

1) Yelling at teens: similar effect to physical punishment

2) A video on The power of positive thinking.

3) Most mental health patients prefer psychotherapy over drugs

4) Teaching Heroism How One Program Is Helping Kids Become Heroes by , About.com Guide

Saturday, August 24, 2013

Saturday's Songs for the Soul: "Tomorrow," A Three Minute Positive Psychology Lesson




Thought for the Day: I have always loved the song, "Tomorrow," from the musical, Annie. The music is by Charles Strouse  and the Lyrics are by Martin Charnin. It is a good example of a song that addresses all the sadness and sorrow in life, but also gives a sense of hope for tomorrow to be better. It's a mini-positive psychology lesson. The melody is uplifting although it also has a slow tempo. I hope your tomorrows bring better and better days. What songs give you a lift when you are feeling down?











Saturday, August 17, 2013

#FF Friday's Fabulous Finds: Autism, Columbine, Making Your Own Luck and Marriage Tips



Thought for the Day: It's actually Saturday & I am late in posting #FF Friday's Fabulous Finds. Somehow the end of the summer has been exceptionally busy so I will post this now and tomorrow I will post a double post for Saturday's Songs for the Soul and a Sunday's Comic, to catch up. Here are some interesting articles I found this week. A mother's plea for tolerance of differences is an important article for all parents & children to read before the start of the school year. The principal of Columbine High School keeps his promise to his community. From positive psychology some suggestions of ways to make your own luck may be helpful as the new school year begins. Finally, 10 research finding on marriage you may not be aware of. Have a wonderful weekend!

Will You Help Me Change The World For Our Children? Mom, Blogger at Life With Greyson, World Changeron Huffington Posts Parents The Blog, August 16, 2013

Columbine principal keeping emotional vow Frank DeAngelis, Columbine High School's principal during the 1999 shooting, made a pretty big promise that he is just about ready to fulfill. 

Make Your Own Luck Five principles for making the most of life's twists and turns.


 

Friday, May 24, 2013

#FF Friday's Fabulous Finds: Resilience & Medical Miracles Keep Dreams Alive



Thought for the Day: It's Friday & time for my fabulous finds. These are truly inspirational. This week I have been writing about how to recover from trauma following the Tornado in Oklahoma. Here are 3 finds related to resilience, a major goal of positive psychology in the face of traumatic events. Since Monday is Memorial Day, my first find is a wonderful video about a veteran's drive to beat the odds & continue to achieve his dreams. See how he is beating the odds & running marathons despite having lost not only his leg, but also his hip. The second find is an indigogo crowd fundraising campaign which will surely help others amputees. A Canadian group is using the youngest victim of the marathon bombing, Martin Richard's words "No More Hurting People," to raise funds for survivors of the Boston Marathon Bombing.  You can view a video, buy a tee shirts or help their cause by sharing the site with others & keep Richard's dream alive. My third find is a miraculous new medical achievement. Doctors were able to a 3-D laser printer to create an airway splint to save the life of a baby boy who used to stop breathing nearly every day.

Photo from Eduard Lychik's Facebook


 Eduard  Lychik, wounded warrior, beats the odds.




Photo from Facebook



Martin Richard's message helping to raise funds for Boston Marathon Bombing victims.





Kaiba Gionfriddo (Facebook)


Medical invention saves a baby's life.

Friday, August 3, 2012

Dreams On Wheels Part IV: On the Road


Thought for the Day: When you change your routine, you open yourself up to new experiences. I have been anticipating this tour for some time now & already in two days have so many wonderful new experiences that I will be writing about them over the next few months. I'd like to give you a glimpse of what I have been discovering & will elaborate in detail in the future.

Day 1: Weston, NYC, PA, MD, DC, & VA. Road trips have excitement, disappointments, & surprises. I started off bright & early, & was ready when my interns, Kat, Andrew & Katherine arrived around 8:45 AM. All the books, flyers & clothing were packed & ready to go. When the Rental car did not arrive at 9 AM as planned, calls were made & we learned that the car was not ready for us. It needed an oil change & would be ready in about 40 minutes. We had breakfast & waited. Because of the late arrival we discussed how we might adjust our plans to stop along the way.

When the car finally arrived around 10:00 AM, it was raining! We opened our umbrellas & proceeded to pack up 4 suitcases, 4 computer bags, some food & drinks, & 7 boxes of books & supplies! The rental company allowed us to start from Weston, but we delayed signing up additional drivers. They told us we could do so at any of their offices along the route. Because of the rain, we were unable to put the signs on the van, but by 10:30 AM  Dreams On Wheels 2012 was off & running!
Kat, Kathryn, DrB, & Andrew in NYC with our new signs for Dreams On Wheels

Mitch, Aspiring Singer
By the time we reached NYC, the sun greeted us as well. Our signs went up, we took some pictures & found the 1st two people to interview in our roving positive psychology project. In this traveling research project, I want to discover how people are doing in the pursuit of their dreams. 

With newspapers & television reporting so much of the negative happenings in our world, I'd like to assess how people's dreams are impacted. Are people cancelling their dreams, due to all the strife in the world? Mitch, an aspiring actor & singer, living in NYC was at the Cloisters with Tracy, his mother, a teacher from OH were the first people we approached and interviewed. Parts of their interviews can be viewed at the top of this page. Mitch's dreams are alive & well & thriving! He is even working on a musical about a young couple working on their dreams! 
We also interviewed his mother to see how she raised such a 'wake up dreamer.' Interestingly, Tracy did a great job dream parenting her son, but seems to be questioning her ability to accomplish her own dreams to travel due to financial concerns. I spoke with her about an older couple I know in their 80's who traveled around Europe by volunteering to help harvest fruits on farms. I encouraged her to give herself the same kind of encouragement she gave her sons & her students to follow their dreams. I also suggested that she read my book to see other ways to accomplish her dreams even when finances are tight.

Dream Team Kathryn, Kat, Andrew & Dr. Barbara Lavi by the statue of Babe's Dream at Camden Yard Baltimore
Dream Team In the footsteps of Babe Ruth
Due to time constraints & traffic, we went to Baltimore MD & postponed our stop in DC until Sunday, but in Baltimore we found 3 more subjects not far from the statue of Babe Ruth, the Dreamer, at Oriole Park at Camden Yards. Parts of their interviews are in the above video as well. Their insights into the progression of their dreams were very interesting.  We met, Mike, a man, in his 40's from Philadelphia, who just landed his dream job. We also spoke to Rebecca a 24 year old woman from Baltimore,  who dreamed of being a chef only to realize that she wants to be a restaurant owner. She is now working on accomplishing that dream & is glad that she first trained as & worked as a chef before deciding to become an owner. Linda, a retiree from Florida, told us about her dream journey. She fought the expectation that women could only become teachers, nurses, secretaries or housewives & became an interior decorator. Later in life, realizing that she needed to be a salesperson to be a decorator, she decided to become a teacher. Now she is retired and says she is living her dream!

On Day 2 in Richmond VA, we toured & met with staff who are graduates of Boaz & Ruth, one of the charities featured in The Wake Up and Dream Challenge. Meeting with these amazing ex-offenders who now have a second chance in life to reach their dreams was inspiring. Their interviews will follow soon as well. Their mistakes & incarceration did not stop them from moving towards their dreams, thanks to the amazing program Boaz & Ruth offers their apprentices. I also had time to meet with Martha Rollins, founder of Boaz & Ruth, who joined me for a one half hour interview with Joann Mathis on her radio show Artists, Designers, and Things oh My. You can listen to the interview on the link to her site.

Today I begin my work with Elimination of Prejudice's National Convention here in Richmond VA.  Hope you will follow our journey. I will post as frequently as I can, since so much is happening!
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Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Dreams On Wheels Part III: Olympic Dreams

Dreams On Wheels 2012 Tour Route

Thought for the Day: As I prepare to start my Dreams on Wheels 2012 tour tomorrow, the Olympics are in full swing. When I began planning the tour, I did not realize that the Olympics would coincide with my trip. I regret that my TV viewing time, as well as my time for writing blog posts about the stories of the athletes, is limited, since I love the Olympics. In particular, I find the stories of the athletes' overcoming adversity inspiring. Olympic athletes are true 'wake up dreamers.' They can inspire us all to push ourselves & reach our own personal best.
Triumph
Jordyn Wieber Tears

Often their dreams to attend the Olympics start when they are children. Their parents enroll them in a sport and they discover their passion. Many children dream of becoming a world class athletes, but to make it to the Olympics they must train diligently for many years before they are old enough to qualify. Years of early morning practices,  countless competitions, wins and losses, triumphs and failures, as well as tears of joy & tears of disappointment, mark the journey towards their dreams. It takes talent,  perseverance, and passion to make it to their Olympic dreams. There are many obstacles that get in the way. The newscasts are filled with tales of bouts with injuries, cancer, loss of loved ones, financial hardships that could easily stop many people from continuing on the path to their dreams. When they overcome adversity and reach the Olympics the achievement is even sweeter. Winning is glorious, but just being among the world's greatest athletes should be enough to make every Olympian proud.

Athletics lend themselves to quantifiable tasks which can be measured by numbers of repetitions and the results can also be easily measured. In life not all dreams are as easy to map out and measure. However, when you chart out your dreams, you can find ways to measure and assess your progress.  'Wake up dreams' using the Dream Positioning System, can help you map your way to your dreams. Listen carefully to the stories of the athletes. Let them inspire you to start moving towards your dreams.

No 'wake up dream' is too small or too lofty to aspire to reach. Tomorrow I will be starting the Dreams On Wheels 2012 book tour, celebrating dreams & dreamers, the release of my new e-book versions on Amazon.com, The Wake Up and Dream Challenge, benefiting 21 dream nonprofit organizations helping people overcome adversity and reach their dreams. I will be visiting with three of the charities benefiting from my book, Boaz & Ruth, Elimination of Prejudice & Menorah Park. I will tell you more about them in subsequent posts.

Dreams On Wheels is also a traveling positive psychology research project complete with a Dream Team of interns conducting & filming interviews with people along the route, in NYC, Philadelphia, Washington DC & more. I was into positive psychology long before it had an official name & hope to discover how Americans' dreams are faring in these tough financial times. The tour & clips from the interviews can be followed live & on multiple social media sites.

I hope you will make some time while you are watching the Olympics to visit my blog & facebook page to hear how people along the way are meeting the challenges of today's world as they move towards their dreams.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

You Don't Have to Be Pollyanna or Wear Rose Colored Glasses to Be a Dreamer

Ultimate Optimist Glasses by Laurinjade from Photobucket
Life through ROSE colored glasses by Mamaaunte (Photobucket)
Thought for the Day: A recent comment on an earlier blog made me reflect on whether people are reading my blog & assuming that I must be wearing rose colored glasses. My passion to encourage people to connect with & work towards their dreams may make some people think I am out of touch with the negative realities of life & our world. The truth is that I am aware of the harsh realities we face today. However, I believe that we all can do something about these challenges if we take action. I hope others will share their negative experiences & how they overcame them or your reactions to this Anonymous comment. I welcome all comments & see them as opportunities to open tough discussions & search for creative solutions to these & other problems we all face.

The anonymous comments came to a previous post:  Part IV: Help Me Start A Gratitude Project Deep In the Heart of Texas. Here's what they wrote:
     I am sorry that I cannot make your dream to find everything in our past wonderful.. I could never get in to see my counselor, whoever she was. i wanted to graduate at 16, but it seems every one stood in my way. I had to get out of school, & get out on my own, & still no one helped me with anything. The Jewish girls made up awful lies about me, and the mothers in B'nai Brith made up worse ones, just because i was sexy, not promiscuous, and they felt threatened by me. I was accused, behind my back, because no one had the strength to confront me, of horrible things the other girls did. Why didn't anyone ask me if they were true, & why were those mothers so willing to believe it was the Shicksa who had done the deeds, & not the Jewish girls? Bellaire was horrible & I was so glad to get out of there. i wanted a good education, because my mom said they could take away your house, your money & your jewels, but they could never take away your ind. It seems that most of those in Bellaire, attempted just that. When I said I wanted to be a doctor, I was ridiculed, then finally told that I would never have the money to do it. Thanks! for that dream busted!! I was told the only thing I could do was secretary, nurse, or teacher. Thanks Again!! for that dream busted, as none of those things were the least bit interesting. And no one would help me find a way to get a college degree. Well, I have been successful in my own way. I have been a community activist, discovered unknown species, wrote deed restrictions & saved a town from demolition, was on TV & in the news several times, all in spite of the "Fine" education I got at Bellaire. it was not a nice experience. I survived it in spite of the jealousy & hostility. there was not one school counselor who did a thing to help me, nor any teachers, save for Mrs. DuPont & Mrs. Finch.

 
Rose Colored Glasses By jjh4 (Photobucket)
Unfortunately, Anonymous was bullied & discriminated against in my high school. I remember the cattiness & feelings of not being part of some of the cliques that exist in all schools. I was not & am not blind to discrimination & prejudice (see recent series of posts on bullying: Part IPart IIPart III,Part IV), but I do believe that we can help make changes in this world if we allow ourselves to dream, imagine & work to make a difference.
Here's my response to Anonymous' comments:
  
     Dear Anonymous, Thank you for sharing your experiences. I am sorry to hear that for you, Bellaire was so negative. I wish you had been fortunate enough to have had Ms Edwards as a guidance counselor. I worked in her office for 2 years & know she tried to encourage everyone to go to college & helped them get scholarships. As one of 4 children in a single parent family, I would not have been able to follow my dreams without financial aid. High School was not all wonderful & being a teenager had it's challenges. I was not "in with the in crowd," but found people who did not care about money & status. Prejudice & ignorance go hand in hand & it occurs among people from all religions, races & ethnic backgrounds. I, for one, do what I can to educate & advocate for tolerance & respect of all people. It sounds like you overcame the adversity & have accomplished many of your dreams. It is never too late to change the end of your story & start working on dreams that you would still like to accomplish.