Motivational Monday: Is The Key To Happiness Hiding In Your Closet

Is The Key To Happiness Hiding In Your Closet?

Thought for the Day: I never cease to be in awe of the creative process. Inspiration often comes in strange ways. Today's post proves that even mundane chores or tasks we dislike can be inspiring. I've always struggled with trying to keep my closets in order. Every few months, I get frustrated when things get disorganized and I try to rearrange things. The order lasts for a while but the disarray inevitably returns. In drawers, I can't see what I have, so when I pull things out my order becomes a mess. On shelves things never seem to fit properly. Eventually, what were neat piles start falling down. 

     Therefore, about a week ago when I saw a teaser on Facebook that said, "A video on how to organize your closets will change your life," I was intrigued and clicked to view it. This is not a post about how to organize your closets, but the 3 minute clip taught the viewer to fold clothes so that you could store them tightly stacked them so you can see every item, even in drawers. I watched and decided to try the technique.

       Now, not only can I now see all the clothes I have, I was able to consolidate things and have more room in my closets. You may be wondering, "What does cleaning and organizing a closet have to do with psychology, inspiration, motivation or happiness?" Read on and you see that the key to happiness may have be hiding in your closet. 

Tuesday's Psychology Research: Note 2 Younger Self Part !V: Are You a Social Learner an Action Taker or Both?

Thought for Today: Somehow the fall has been exceptionally busy for me. I will be spending time again on a critical incident today, so that my writing time is minimal. Therefore, I decided to write about two of the typical groups of responses to people's notes to their younger self. (If you have not read the previous segments, you may want to take a look. Part I: Results From Advice To Your Younger Selves: What Makes Us Regret Our Youth?, Part II: What Makes One Person Survive And Thrive & Another Bend & Surrender? & Part 3: Mind Games Or How Do We Learn To Trust Ourselves?). These two groups, "Social Learners" and "Action Takers" raise multiple questions. If you see yourself In either of these groups, I would love to hear from you. What or who taught you these life lessons?

The 1st group are "Social Learners." They were a relatively small segment of the responders. Only 4 of the 72 responses mentioned improving social relationships as their advice to their younger selves. Their advice included: Be Kind, Love More, Love only Who Treats You Right, Be More Social. Unfortunately, these responders did not elaborate on their choices. I can only guess that they were more socially isolated or awkward and learned over time that friendships and relationships were important for their emotional well being. Perhaps they had a few broken hearts in the process.

The second much larger group, included a little under 1/3 of the responses to the question of what 2 word advice you would give to your younger self.. In the "Action Takers" group, action is the key to finding the path to health and happiness. Their advice sounds like a cheer leading squad encouraging their younger selves to take action, "Focus Deeply, Chill Out, Take Action,  Eat Healthy, Keep Writing. Keep Active, Love Yourself, Be Love, Leave Home, Take Risks, Set Goals (2), Dream, Let Go, Be Brave, Be Real, Lighten Up, Pay Attention, Enjoy Today, Go On, & Think Ahead." These responders did not share what led to their 2 word conclusions. Therefore, they leave me with multiple questions. Were the people in this group always risk takers? Their advice does not connote the kind of painful learning processes that the "Survivors" or "Mind Gamers" seemed to have gone through to reach their conclusions. Did these people grow up in families that encouraged them to take risks, dream and be brave, making it easier for them to mature and accomplish things in their lives? If you are inclined to confront challenges in this way, I would love to hear more about how you became an "Action Taker."

I hope to complete this series this week, but your comments will help me develop additional topics that interest you. Thanks in advance for any comments and suggestions. 

Thoughtful Tuesdays: Note 2 Younger Self Part II: What Makes One Person Survive and Thrive & Another Bend & Surrender?

Thought for the Day: Yesterday, I  began sharing the results from my mini research project. I am excited to let you know that people have already written responses to some of the questions I posed. By doing so, I hope that the posts will become even richer. Thank you in advance for your thoughtful comments. Today, I want to address another type of two word notes of advice to your younger selves which reflects a group of inspirational people, I called “survivors.”  This group is in many ways the one we can all learn the most from since they have learned from and overcome painful life experiences. Even without knowing the stories behind their two word advice my heart could feel that there lives had not been easy. They learned their lessons from the school of hard knocks. They reach out to their younger selves with messages like:

      "So Sorry, Tell Someone, Set Boundaries, Grow Anyway, Waste Your Youth, Why God?, Don’t Worry, Behave Yourself. Quit Drinking, Stop Crying, Choose Happiness, You’re Not to Blame, Endure.”

A few of these brave survivors shared their stories. I will cautiously tell you about their journeys without giving details that could identify them. There were thirteen people from the 72 in the study whose responses seemed to fit this category. One person explained, "because I am not where I want to be in life. I could never have imagined that my life would turn out like it has. Essentially, I feel drained, beaten, and slighted by fate. I turn to God and ask why.” They went on to say that they chose a question for their younger self which they could interpret on their own. It had taken ten years, but somehow they trusted that their younger self would find the answers. 

Another person from this group who is only in their twenties would advise their teenage self "not to worry." They had learned that worrying made it harder to cope with raising three young children. Becoming a parent may be a fast track to wisdom beyond your years. 

It was interesting to learn that many of the survivors in this study were in their teens when they broke away from a painful life experience. Literally, some “burned” their path to freedom when they stopped trying to fit into someone else’s expectations or were forced to build boundaries between themselves and someone who was abusive to them. One of these “survivors" took only 90 minutes to escape, moved away, started a business and made a “fresh start” when she had barely entered adulthood. 

For others the journey would take much longer with the issues coming back to haunt them after 40 years. Some found their strength through therapy, others through volunteer work with young adults coping with similar difficulties. For some the death of the person who abused or the loss of a loved one reopened wounds that they had considered buried and resolved.

The conclusion to “Choose Happiness" came to one of the members of this group after “spending a lot of (their) life letting clinical depression get the better of (them) and taking a long time to realize that (they) had to decide to get the better of it.” 

Only one woman (now just in her early 20’s) from all the participants in the study had different messages for herself at different ages. Her progression and development were reflected in the shift in the advice she would give to her younger selves. Although she did not say what led to her tears and fears, her first comment to her 18 - 20 year old self, "stop crying.” would place her in the survivors group.  As she matured and found more strength, her self talk would bring her into one of the other groups with words of self encouragement: “Go On” and finally to the recognition of “You’re right.” 

This young woman’s journey is similar to others in the survivor’s group. They needed to learn that they were not to blame for things that happened to them or those they loved. One participant’s touching powerful words would be applicable to many of the others in this group,  "I was reminded that.... I needed to forgive myself. Not because I thought I could have done something differently, but because I kept blaming myself for what others had done to me. This left me consumed with rage and anger and as a result, I was NOT living life to the fullest." 

Although the survivors have suffered and made mistakes, they, unlike those who surrender, seem to intuitively have gained wisdom and found resilient ways to overcome adversity. What gives these people the strength and wisdom to break away and save themselves from the tenuous situations even when they are barely adults? One of the threads that they seem to have in common is that they were forced into roles of responsibility in order to survive and stepped up to the plate. Some had to fend for themselves at a young age. Others became young parents. It could be that being forced to learn to parent yourself at a young age, even if your parents were neglectful, acts as a catalyst for growth, self awareness and wisdom. One of my readers, +Sidra Luna,  sent me a link to an article on the positive aspects of the twentysomething brain. When tragedy befalls someone at a young age, their developing brain may have some unique qualities which are advantageous and help them cope. For some of these young survivors, their youthful passion, fearlessness in the face of risk and curiosity about human nature, may help them discover solutions to their dilemmas.

I have worked with people who are survivors throughout my career and am always impressed by their strength, wisdom and bravery. My guess is that somewhere along the way there was someone, a parent, grandparent or teacher who loved them and helped them know they were worthy of having a better life. What do you think? What allows one person to survive and thrive when another bends and surrenders?

Motivational Mondays: Something Different: What 2 Word Advice Would You Give To Your Younger Self?

Thought for the Day: On Facebook today, I saw a very interesting question (posed by Andre Donavan Henry. I decided do an experiment (I am a psychologist, so it makes sense to me!) to turn the tables around and ask you, my readers to answer the question: If you could write a note to your younger self, what would you say in only two words? If you don't mind, I may use some of the answers in a later post. I am curious to see what people write. Feel free to say how old you are and why you would give this 2 word advice to your younger self, but it is not required. I played a little with the image and hope they do not mind. Come back later in the week to see what others said and how I use your advice on this blog.

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom: Make Time Your Best Friend Or It May Become Your Worst Enamy

Thought for the Day: On Monday, I showed how time can be the greatest motivator. It can help people change. On Tuesday, I gave you an assignment and promised to explain why it is important in today's post. If you have not read Tuesday's post or completed the brief assignment (5 - 10 minutes), I would encourage you to do it since it will be helpful to you in making time your best friend. Today's quote will give you insight into the task I gave you on Tuesday. Here's the quote, incase the movement makes it a bit hard to digest:

"To make time your best friend, dream as if you have forever and act as if you only have today. To Make time your worst enemy, act as if you have forever and dream as if you only have today."

Here's how you can use this quote and the assignment I gave you to start making time your best friend...

Tuesday's Psychology Tip: Make Time Your Best Friend (Part I)

Thought for the Day: I started this post yesterday, but am not even sharing what I wrote. Ironically, I had too little time to complete it. Perhaps the scope was too broad for a simple psychology tip and I will use it some other time. Since the Jewish High Holidays start this evening, I saw most of my clients on Monday and Tuesday leaving too little time to write a post I would be willing to publish. Either way, it serves as a lesson about making time your best friend. Best friends are flexible and forgiving with one another. I hope you will be as well. So today, I will be posting Tuesday's Psychology Tip right now, followed by Wednesday's Words of Wisdom later today. To do this, I need your help.

I'm also going to do something slightly different today. I always try to make my posts thought provoking. Today, I want you, my readers, to do more than just think about the post. I'd like to give you an thought provoking assignment. Although it could take longer, all I ask is that you spend one to five minutes on the assignment today. You can come back to it when you have more time, but for today, take just a few minutes. It will help you turn time into your best friend.   Read on to see the assignment...

Motivational Mondays: The Greatest Motivational Tool Is Time

Thought for the Day: In preparation for each week's writing for the blog, I mull over a few ideas. My thought process this week began by focusing on the turn of the seasons. Then it moved to something a client said about four months ago which helped motivate me and many of my clients over the last few months. The client's suggestion dovetailed with something I learned about my grandmother's nephew, Herb Crane, z.l., whom I wrote about in another post after he passed away at the age of 95 last May. It also resonated with and fit well with psychological research findings about habit change. Somehow these four thoughts collided inspiring what appears to be another miniseries on time and motivation.

Back in May, one of my clients came in and told me that she had started working on getting fit. She had been working long hours and neglecting all physical activity. Not only was she uncomfortable with the extra pounds she had gained, she also wanted to improve her life style. One of my client's friends with similar concerns about her own health and fitness suggested that they could help one another stay motivated. They decided to start walking together whenever possible. The friend had heard that it would help to practice this principle: "Don't break the chain." The basic idea behind the "Don't break the chain" method is simple. Most great ideas are simple and here's why I believe this is a great motivational concept...

Motivational Mondays: Cleaning Out The Closets In Your Mind

Thought for the Day: For the past couple of weeks, in anticipation of the change of seasons, I have been working on a fall clean up. A few times a year, I focus on my closets. Each time I do, I come up with better ways to keep things organized and in clear view. I try coordinating color and types of clothing, use plastic boxes, label things and think that I have found the solution to disarray in my closets. I donate the impulse "bargain" purchases that often I have not worn making them expensive mistakes. I give away clothes that don't fit anymore and put other things away for the off season. When I finish, my closets look wonderful. However, over time the clutter seems to magically reappear. I take advantage of the change of seasons and the need to switch from summer to winter apparel, to set out to conquer my closets one more time.

This morning, while thinking about what I want to write, several ideas arose, not just for Motivational Monday, but for the other weekly segments of this blog. If you like this segment, you may want to come back for the Tuesday's Psychology Tips, Wednesday's Words of Wisdom and Thursday's Psychology Trivia. It may be like a mini-series of posts addressing ways to de-clutter your internal closet and reset your mind. This too is an ongoing process which can be beneficial for our mental health.

When I think about the process that led to today's post, "Cleaning Out the Closets of Your Mind," the ideas actually began following a meeting with a client on Friday. I'll call her June (not her real name). June is a very bright accomplished woman who has been struggling with depression most of her life. On Friday, she reported that the change in seasons and some anniversaries of difficult life events that occurred in the fall contributed to a very dramatic decline in her mood.

#FF Wonderful Weekend Review: Psychology, Music, Dance, Photography, Comics & More

Click here to see the magazine

Thought for the Day: This morning as I went through my various social network sites' feeds, I found a song by +Mary Gauthier, a great singer songwriter who attended several of my songwriting retreats many years ago, before she sold a small Cajun restaurant in Boston and decided to devote her life to her music. When I tried to find the post using flipboard. I could not find it, but found many other great songs, photos, videos and articles to share with you today. Be sure to check out +Sarah McLachlan's rendition of  "The Rainbow Connection,"and LIGHTS singing "Drive My Soul." A great video showing how 3 musicians surprised a homeless man. There are two dance videos, one that may help change the trend in the dance world to turn away dancers who don't fit the image usually required for professional dance troupes. Keep reading to find an article on ways that hiking is good for your mental and physical health and another on how to motivate yourself to do things you don't want to do. My heart is heavy each time I hear the news from the fighting in Gaza and Israel. I chose a few things about how to make peace and helping others in need. Sadly, it does not look like the efforts to attain a cease fire are holding.
Read on to listen to "Oh Soul" Marry Gauthier's new song...

Motivational Mondays: Yes You Can and Here's How

Thought for the Day: Political campaign slogans can make or break an election. The "Yes We Can" campaign and poster may have been the single most influential element in Barack Obama's presidential victory. It captured the attention of a nation weary of inaction and searching for hope for a better future. Whether the nation has seen the progress that they had hoped for is another question. In fact, the slogan may have in some ways backfired. People may have expected change to happen quickly.

As a psychologist, I know that change takes time. Although psychotherapy empowers people to overcome adversity and make changes in their lives, they need to be patient. Change takes hard work and perseverance if it is to become real and lasting. In a society which thrives on fast food restaurants, smart phones and computers with immediate answers at our fingertips, many people have lost hope on the political arena and "Yes We Can," may now feel like an empty promise. History and time will tell whether actual changes began to occur during this presidency. However, I can help you and clients with challenges facilitate change in their lives and the slogan for you to remember is: "Yes You Can."

Here's some advice on how you can, based on things I have learned over the years in my clinical practice...

Motivational Monday: An Inspiring Video: Never Give Up

Thought for the Day: Today has been one of those frustrating Mondays. Last night I started a virus scan on my computer. It was not finished this morning and finally was completed this evening. Needless to say, all work on the computer was slow and tedious. The day was filled with clinical sessions with clients and a radio interview on the LA Bachelor Pad Talk Radio Show. The interview was on the violence in the sports world and why it is happening more and more lately. When it is posted on their site, I will post a link. At any rate, I just got to writing today's post. Earlier today I saw a very inspiring video on Facebook and decided to share it here today. It shows how a war veteran refused to accept his doctor's prognosis following his injuries in combat. Whenever, I hear stories like this one, I am even more motivated to work on all of my dreams. I hope it impacts on you the same way. Let me know what you think. I'd love to hear your stories of beating the odds as well. It could help motivate others...

Motivational Mondays: Why Motivation Is Grossly Overrated

Thought for the Day: As I began to think about today's post, I began to consider why people are often disappointed in their efforts to accomplish things in life. Discouraged when they fail to see results, they will say, "I have lost my motivation," and give up. With all the hype in our society surrounding motivation  it is not surprising that many people feel that all they need is to be motivated to achieve "success" in life. Do advertising slogans like, "Just Do It " and "Yes You Can," make people feel like failures when they have difficulty accomplishing their dreams in life. Bombarded by endless motivational quotes on posters and facebook pages and stories of young entrepreneurs who have sold start-up businesses for millions of dollars, it is not surprising that many people are feeling discouraged. Although I have been thinking and writing about motivation for many years as a psychologist and here on my blog, a recent experience led me to realize that motivation is grossly overrated. Read on to hear why and what you can do about it if it's not working for you.

#FF Friday's Fabulous Finds: Dyslexia, Children's eBook App, Happiness, Travel Tips, Instagrandma, and 9/11

Click to go to this week's #FF Flipboard Magazine

Thought for the Day: This week's #FF Fabulous Finds  are another mixed bag of finds. Today's finds include new research on the causes and treatment of Dyslexia which offers hope to families helping children with the reading disorder. There is also an article about a newApp for Kids to encourage them to find and read e-books that look and feel like real books. Two articles offer suggestions of ways to improve your life and be happier. Since summer is coming, I've included a very long article to help you travel to exotic places around the world for $50 a day. The story on how Instagram is helping a an #Instagrandma who is dealing with cancer live life to the fullest is clearly inspiring. Finally with the opening of the 9/11 museum this week, I chose an article on how one daughter who lost her mother on 9/11 is using film to try to prevent tragedies like 9/11 from occurring again. Have a wonderful Memorial Day weekend!

Motivational Mondays: How Can Single Moms Overcome The Mother's Day's Blues

Thought for the Day: All day I have been having problems with internet connectivity. It is very frustrating, but while I am connected I will write a brief motivational piece. As some of you know I have been answering questions on a new Single Mom's website, Single Mom's Playbook. As I prepared my posts for Mother's Day it came to my attention how difficult Mother's Day can be for single moms.

So much of what makes Mother's Day work is dependent on having a supportive husband who helps the children celebrate their mothers. When there is no father in the picture or even worse when there is an ex-husband who is unsupportive, Mother's Day can become a reminder of how unappreciated you may be. This may lead to the Mother's Day Blues. One of my clients who had a contentious divorce and is battling with her ex-husband was not even sure if she would be with her kids on Sunday despite the divorce agreement. In addition, when finances are tight, there may not be any leftover money to celebrate. Should single mothers just ignore the holiday? How can they help their kids learn the importance of appreciating all they do for their children? What do you think? Have you felt left out and unappreciated because there is no father to teach your kids? Is it important?

I think it is a subject that is often neglected, but needs to be addressed given the fact that over 50% of marriages end in divorce.

Motivational Mondays: Tabitha's Wish and A Video Everyone Should See

Thought for the Day: I have two motivational pieces for today. One is an example of how social media can do good and the other on how important it is to "Look Up" from your phone and computers. The 1st story cam to me via a message from a facebook fan. Duncan K McLindon had left me a note some time ago. His message went unnoticed  since he had posted it on a Facebook page for my psychology practice, ACT Now Psychotherapy.  An intern created the page, but until about a week ago I had not posted anything there. I post regularly on a facebook fan page for  my book, but simply never made time for the other page. Last week, I posted how a 3 year old can teach us about philanthropy. When I read Duncan's message, I was moved and wrote back that I would share his 12 year old daughter Tabitha's story today.  It is yet another story of what children can teach us.
     My plan was just to share Duncan's story, but today I saw another post of a video which we all need to see and share with everyone we know. It has been viewed on YouTube by over 13 million people, so it is clearly a powerful video. I hope you will read on, see both sides of the equation and share it with people you know and care about. On the one hand, social media can enhance our lives. However, on the other hand, too much of a good thing can detract from our lives.  

Motivational Mondays: New England Weather and Resiliency

Thought for the Day: I know it is not Monday, but I wanted to post this and will catch up tomorrow. You see, I was in Boston from late Saturday night till late last night for a critical incident. I wrote this post, but was unable to publish it, since I did not have internet access while I was working. I travel to help corporations when tragedy strikes. Sometimes it is for a death or serious illness of an employee. Other times it's is to work with banks following robberies. Just over a year ago, I was called to help two companies following the Boston Marathon bombings. I lived in Boston for many years and have family here, so a part of me resides in this great city. While I worked this weekend, following another tragic event, I could not help but reflect on how things have changed since last year.

Motivational Mondays: Bill Cosby and You on Motivation & Fear

Thought for the Day: I have been nursing bronchitis all weekend & just got to the blog with less energy than usual. I looked through drafts that I never finished & found this wonderful photo & quote by Bill Cosby. I  decided to use it as a starting point for a conversation with you.

Instead of writing my thoughts on this quote, I'd like to try something different. I'd rather hear your thoughts. What do you think? Are there things that you want, but too afraid to try? For instance, do you hate your current job, but fear trying to find another in a bad economy? Are you unhappy in your current relationship, but afraid to talk about your feelings with your partner? Is your adult child about to make what you feel is a huge mistake, but you are afraid to let them know your opinion, since they are grown & on their own? Do you think that Bill Cosby's recommendation to simply decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it will help you to go ahead & confront the issue? Is being determined the most important element in motivation? Are there other psychological issues that need to be in place to overcome the fears?

Can any of you recall a time when you were afraid to do something, decided that you would do it anyway because it was more important to you & accomplished your objective? I'd love to hear about it.

Motivational Miraculous Mondays: Part I: 2013 Top 10 Posts

Thought for the Day: This morning I awakened to the sound of a downpour of rain. Normally, the sound of rain is not the most welcome event for me; however, today I was looking forward to the rain. When I looked outside, the rain had washed away most of the ice and snow that has blanketed my yard & car for several days as New England & 2/3s of the country has battled bitter cold temperatures. It is interesting how your perspective changes due to life circumstances. Today's post is a continuation of January's celebration of a New Year and my second year of blogging. This is part I of a 2 part post of the Top 10 Miraculous Motivational Mondays blog posts of 2013. I have chosen the posts using the number of page views each of these posts had.

Flashback Motivational Monday: 4 Creative Ways to Solve Problems & Stay Motivated

Thought for the Day: Since I am visiting with friends from Canada today, I decided to repost this Motivational Monday post from last March, when I started this blog series of motivational posts. Have a great start to the week.

Thought for the Day: My daughter sent me an image of an anonymous inspirational quote on facebook this week which said, "when nothing goes right... go left." She sends me quotes & images when she finds one that she thinks I might want to use in my blog or on my facebook page (where I post creative images & quotes). I loved the quote which came in simple black ink on white background (see photo on right). However,  I felt I needed to expand on it. The image above begins to give my take on how I help people explore all the options when nothing seems to be going right. I decided to use it to offer four tips to help you find alternatives when nothing seems to be going right. Feel free to ask questions about my new quote: "when nothing is going right to go left, up, down, around, under & anyway you can to make things work better. - Dr. Barbara Lavi"

Creativity plays an integral part in my therapeutic approach, which I call A.C.T. Now Psychotherapy. The "A" stands for "Active," the "C" for "Creative," & the "T," for "Time Sensitive." Even though it is one third of the equation, in many ways the "C" is the most important element in my approach.  Our society has an ambivalent relationship with creativity. On the one hand we love music, art & photography. The huge success of facebook & YouTube are evidence of the love affair we have with photos, videos & music. However, the number of starving artists eking out a living in odd jobs attests to the fact that we do not reward artists well unless they become famous. How many people are discouraged from following their creative muse when they choose a career? In school certain types of creativity are not rewarded either. The emphasis on rote learning, multiple choice & true or false testing reflects this tendency.

It is not surprising, therefore, that many people lose touch with creative problem solving skills & do not have access to them when confronting problems in life. The original quote even fits the solution into one of two options: right or left. So here are a few creative problem solving tips:

1) There is not one right answer to problems we confront in life. In reality even the way the quote is set up reflects a mistaken notion we are taught to believe. It is an over simplification to think of life in terms of "right" or "wrong." There are endless "right" ways to live our lives. What may be right for one person may not be right for you or someone else. We must each find what feels right to us. There could be many different "right" ways to live for each of us. Every problem therefore,  has multiple possible solutions.

Often when we feel like everything is going wrong, it is a sign of some depression. Depression makes us even more likely to think that there are no possible alternatives. When we feel depressed we also tend to get stuck, become inactive & reclusive. Other times, we keep repeating behaviors that are not working. The first step to getting out of these viscous cycles is to use our creative minds to imagine several alternative possibilities. Try coming up with at least 3 or 4 different ways you might try to solve the problem.

2) As you begin to fantasize about these possibilities, fire your inner dream buster. Your dream buster is the critic inside your head that says, "You don't have the money, skills, connections, health (& endless other excuses) to accomplish that solution." Even if you doubt that you can accomplish these alternatives, ignore the critic's negative voice & write them down.

3) Pick one of these possible new directions & come up with 3 or 4 action steps to explore how you could start taking baby steps toward starting in the new direction.

4) Try a few of the action steps. For instance, if you are unhappy in your current job, but afraid to leave in today's difficult job market, You can go on monster.com & begin to search for jobs in your field to see what is out there. Or you could call someone you know who left your company & is now employed elsewhere to find out how they are doing & whether they are hiring. If an option feels right, keep pursuing it, if not, try another one of the other options till you find one that fits & works for you. Or go back to step one & try again till you find a new direction.

In subsequent posts, I'll tell you about some additional creative techniques that can help in situations like these. I will share stories of how my clients developed these kind of creative skills & moved in directions they did not imagine were possible before they started in therapy or read my book. I hope you will share your stories of ways you found new directions when you felt stuck in the past.

Have a great start to the week! I hope you will come back on Wednesday for What If? Wednesdays short video on what would happen if we changed things to improve the world. In case you missed it, there are now 2 weekend feeds: Saturdays Songs for the Soul & Sunday's Comic Strips. Coming soon new Tuesday & Thursday posts with some fun twists, so stay come back often, follow the blog, put it in an RSS feed or get e-mail notification when posts come out!

Motivational Monday on Tuesday: The Things Kids Say from A Child Is Missing

Thought for the Day: I like to have flexibility & leave room for spontaneity in life & my blog. I know today is Tuesday & not Monday, but since my knee operation, I have been a bit slower than usual. I was going to write a psychology trivia question until I opened an e-mail from one of the nonprofit organizations featured in & benefiting from my book, A Child Is Missing. Many people are aware of their work in helping to find missing children, but you may not be aware of their anti-bullying & educational programs which try to prevent abductions.  I will be speaking this Saturday at 3 PM EST on bullying prevention on Blind Matters Radio so the bullying epidemic is on my mind. Hopefully, stories like these will motivate you to get involved & do something to help prevent bullying. If all you do is pass the stories along to your friends & family, that will help raise awareness. Do whatever you can. Please share projects & ideas you have that are making a difference in your community as well. I'd love to hear them!

Here is the segment from their newsletter that I felt compelled to share fro A Child Is Missing's Newsletter:

The Things KIDs Say... Photo by George Olsen During the past 10 years A Child Is Missing’s Child Safety Education and Anti-Bullying Program has reached over 60,000 children. Our goal is to make sure they gain a sense on how to stay safe and how to deal with bullying throughout any situation. Although we are the instructors, there are times we learn from the stories they share which helps us curve how we teach each class: One young girl shared that a young boy in her class kept making negative comments about her. She later told on him and he replied that the next time she did something like that he would light her on fire. We learned to discuss more on a key point of "Seeking Help"  immediately and how important it is as a form of standing up for your self. At that same camp, one subject was “The Safety Zone” which emphasizes how important personal space it is . A young girl raised her hand and asked, “What about the man next door?”  At the end of the session I advised the camp counselor to contact the Mom and let her know there was a situation she should know about. This brought to light that we needed to emphasize that not only are strangers dangerous but to be aware of everyone. At another camp, at the end of one our bullying classes, a young boy stood up and expressed , “I was going to commit suicide. But, now I know that I am not alone and I can go and speak with my parents about how I feel!”  All of the kids applauded! The teachers while on the way back to Fort Lauderdale called from their car, telling the story in tears.They knew they saved a life. Local law enforcement assists with the funding of these programs held at the Parks/Recreation facilities in Broward, Miami/Dade, Palm Beach, Sarasota, Delray Beach and some other locations.  Law enforcement cares and hopefully this will encourage others to do the same!