Motivational Monday: Is The Key To Happiness Hiding In Your Closet

Is The Key To Happiness Hiding In Your Closet?

Thought for the Day: I never cease to be in awe of the creative process. Inspiration often comes in strange ways. Today's post proves that even mundane chores or tasks we dislike can be inspiring. I've always struggled with trying to keep my closets in order. Every few months, I get frustrated when things get disorganized and I try to rearrange things. The order lasts for a while but the disarray inevitably returns. In drawers, I can't see what I have, so when I pull things out my order becomes a mess. On shelves things never seem to fit properly. Eventually, what were neat piles start falling down. 

     Therefore, about a week ago when I saw a teaser on Facebook that said, "A video on how to organize your closets will change your life," I was intrigued and clicked to view it. This is not a post about how to organize your closets, but the 3 minute clip taught the viewer to fold clothes so that you could store them tightly stacked them so you can see every item, even in drawers. I watched and decided to try the technique.

       Now, not only can I now see all the clothes I have, I was able to consolidate things and have more room in my closets. You may be wondering, "What does cleaning and organizing a closet have to do with psychology, inspiration, motivation or happiness?" Read on and you see that the key to happiness may have be hiding in your closet. 

Thursday's Psychology Research finds: To Treat Depression, Drugs or Therapy? By RICHARD A. FRIEDMAN, M.D. JANUARY 8, 2015 8:00 AM well.blogs.NYTimes

Stuart Bradford (From well.blogs.NYTimes.com)

Thought for the Day: Today, instead of creating a trivia post, I decided to share a great article I found today from a blog connected to the New York Times (well.blogs.NYTimes.com) by Richard A Friedman, MD. It raises some very important questions about how best to treat depression. It is refreshing to hear a physician question the strong bias towards medication over psychotherapy, even when research findings are supporting psychotherapy or a combination of psychotherapy and medications. I hope you will take a look. Here's the link:
             http://nyti.ms/1xJHC0k

Part I Readers' Choice: Top 10 Posts of 2014: Country Music, Marital Therapy, Quotes & More

Thought for the Day: As the year draws to an end, I like to look back and see which posts have been viewed the most by my readers. Here are the #10, #9, #8, #7 and #6 most read posts of 2014 with a wide range of topics from psychology, inspiration, music, therapy and more. Click on the links below to read the posts:

#10 Saturday's Songs For The Soul:
"She Misses Him In Memory Of Tim Johnson, Hit Songwriter

# 9 Miraculous Mondays:
Can Our Marriage Be Repaired After An Affair?

# 8 Wednesday's Words Of Wisdom:
Carl Rogers And Dr. Barbara Lavi
On Optimism And Psychotherapy

# 7 Wednesday's Words Of Wisdom:
 Rebound Relationships And Brokenhearted Blindness

# 6 #FF Wonderful Weekend Review:
Fabulous Finds From Psychology, Art, Music, Quotes
& Comics Plus Delbert McClinton

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom: Three Ways Grudges Are Like Malignant Tumors

Thought for the Day: In light of the Days of Awe which I discussed on Tuesday, accounting for misdeeds towards others is on my mind. Today's quote came to me from years of work with individuals and couples in therapy.

"Grudges are like malignant tumors, left untreated, they will destroy any relationship."

Unlike tumors, there are no benign grudges. When people hold grudges, it always causes harm. A grudge is one way of expressing anger. We don't tend to hold grudges against strangers. We reserve the "honor" for friends and family members. What many people don't realize is that holding grudges can be harmful to your health. Here's three ways that grudges are like malignant tumors...

Motivational Mondays: Inspiration from Joan Rivers Dreams

*Photo Credit

Thought for the Day: I didn't want to write about Joan Rivers. So many newscasters and specials have followed her sudden death last week. Being a clinical psychologist and writer has it's own unique professional hazards. To be a therapist, one must not only be aware of one's own feelings but also have the ability to empathize with others emotions. It helps therapists to relate to their clients' woes. When I go to movies, a funny scene can have me laughing out loud. In sad movies, I cry prolifically. Last week, when Joan Rivers lost consciousness during what was supposed to be a routine medical procedure, I found myself, like many people around the world, checking online, hoping that she would recover. Even as the news seemed to be less and less hopeful, what psychologists call denial kept me thinking that somehow, the comedienne who joked about death and everything else would somehow live on. All the research on laughter says that it can add at least 10 years to your life expectancy. I imagined Joan Rivers laughing on like George Burns to at least 100 years of age. However, I was wrong. As the tributes and the requests to keep laughing kept streaming on TV and the internet, my unconscious mind sent me a message no psychologist can ignore.

The unconscious works in mysterious ways. I was saddened by the news of Joan River's death and laughed when her jokes were replayed on TV. I was not a huge fan of her humor, but appreciated her talent. I did not know much about her life and learned new things from all the coverage. I went on in my life feeling fine until Friday, when I found myself in a funk.

Here's what I noticed and am sharing in hopes that it will help others...

Tuesday's Psychology Tips: How To Get Rid of an Anxiety Disorder

Thought for the Day: Today is Tuesday. Which means it is time for Tuesday's Psychology Tips. A few days ago a question appear on HealthTap which brings the tip for today. The question was: How to get rid of an anxiety disorder without a therapist? Surely there  are many ways to reduce anxiety, but my reply was to ask, "Why wouldn't you consider psychotherapy?" Here's my answer with a bit more detail than I posted on HealthTap...

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom: Life Doesn't Come With Blueprints

Thought for the Day: I have been working on redesigning my website for my clinical practice and really could use your help today. In the process of working on the redesign, I came up with an interesting logo. The logo design lead me to today's words of wisdom which will be included in the new logo. I'd love to know what you think of both the logo and the quote.
     For many years, I have used the name of the therapeutic approach that I have developed, ACT Now Psychotherapy, as the name of my private practice. The tagline: Active, Creative, Time-sensitive is based on the A.C.T. in the title and explains how my therapeutic approach works. The logo above triggered my imagination and led to a different tag line. Here's what happened...

Sunday's Comic Strips: Psychotherapy, Mental Health, Relaxation, TextGeneration & Funny Photos

Thought for the Day: Here's a few funny comics & photos for this Sunday afternoon. I hope you enjoy them! Thanks to +CareLuLu , +People of Color Network , +HealthyPlace , +Dueling Analogs , +Likemorelikes.com, +Edward Vigeant & a home on Dune Road in Westhampton Beach Long Island for the photos!

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom: Need Help? Be Careful When You Put Your Future Into Someone Else's Hands

Thought for the Day: Today is Wednesday which means it's time for Words of Wisdom. People often ask how to choose a therapist. There are multiple options available; however, they are not all equal. LCSWs, Psychologists and Psychiatrists are bound to legal, ethical and legal standards that coaches, fortune tellers, and unlicensed therapists are not. As the image above states, you could put a message in a bottle and send out an SOS. Then you would simply take the advice of whomever picked up the bottle at the beach. You could go to a fortune teller or tarot card reader and hear what they see in your future. They might make some accurate educated guesses based on what you look like and how you respond to their comments. You could hire a coach who could cheer you on, tell you what to do based on their life experiences which might be similar to your own. It might help or it might not. Or you could contact a trained professional therapist. Here's what I think...

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom: Dr. Lavi on Being a Psychologist

Thought for the Day: It's only Wednesday and I have been very busy. So much so that I did not post yesterday. I looked at an earlier post today to reshare and found a quote that I created a while back. It was inspired by a Carl Rogers quote on optimism. I decided to make a new "moving" image for my quote that better captures the privilege of being a therapist. I hope that you will find your calling and be as energize by your work as I am. Have a wonderful day.

Thursday's Psychology Trivia: T or F Life Coaching Is Equal or Better Than Psychotherapy

Thought for the Day: When I prepare Thursday's Psychology Trivia posts, I find a topic and look for research that supports the answer. I have been thinking about today's post for some time, but had trouble doing the research. Here's the question and I will explain why I went ahead and posted it:

True or False: Life Coaching Is Equal or Better Than Psychotherapy

Tuesday's Therapy Tips: What To Do If You're in a Bad Mood Sometimes?

Thought for the Day: I answered a question a while back on Health Tap and think it is an important one to share here, with a little more detail than the 400 characters that health tap allows. It was asked by a 59 year old man, but it could have come from anyone, since men and women of all ages experience moodiness from time to time. He simply said:

I'm in a bad mood some time?

Here's my answer:

We all have bad moods

from time to time. If it happens every once in a while, that's normal. If it occurs frequently, you may want to consider speaking with a therapist to determine why you are feeling down so often. Talking about our negative feelings doesn't increase them, it actually relieves the tension and makes room for more positive moods.

To elaborate a bit more, we all could benefit from taking an inventory of how we are feeling. It could help to assess whether it's time for a mental health check up with a professional. Take some time, ask yourself how have you felt on a scale of 1 to 10, where 10, is joyful, and 1, is depressed, over the last week? Be honest and write it down for every day. If your numbers are leaning towards the negative end of the scale more often than the positive side, try keeping tabs for a few more days. Perhaps you will see a pattern. For instance, if every Monday when you need to return to work you feel depressed, problems at work may need to be addressed. 

Once you begin to see that your "bad moods" are taking up too much space in your life, go ahead and call a psychologist to talk about what is bothering you. Psychotherapy will help you figure it out. You don't have to spend your life feeling down. Over time it will not only hurt you, but may impact on your family and work life as well.

If you would like to get answers like these and connect with me on my Virtual Practice on @HealthTap, click on the link & join me and experts from around the nation 24/7.  

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom: Carl Rogers and Dr. Barbara Lavi on Optimism and Psychotherapy

Thought for the Day: It seems fitting to start Wednesday's Words of Wisdom posts in 2014 with an uplifting quote:

"When I look at the world I'm pessimistic, but when I look at people, I'm optimistic." Carl Rogers

These words come from Carl Rogers, 1902 - 1987, a highly influential 20th century psychologist. He was one of the founders of the humanistic or client-centered approach to psychotherapy. Dr. Rogers authored 16 books and more than two hundred articles. Among the many honors bestowed on Rogers was the Distinguished Scientific Contribution Award of the American Psychological Association. Rogers believed in the basic goodness of mankind, free will and that human beings strive for self-actualization and creativity. 
     When I find a quote for these posts, I often think my job is done. I write a bit about the quote and the author and I'm finished. However, this morning I woke up and realized it had inspired me to write an additional quote. I guess I'd forgotten how much my orientation to therapy was influenced by and is aligned with Rogerian theory. I spend my days doing client-centered psychotherapy, focusing on their tragedies and triumphs and trusting in their ability to grow and transform their lives. When I was looking for photos for the post on morguefile.com, there were many others I wanted to use. The photos also inspired me to write my own quote. Here are some of the photos and the thoughts that the quote by Rogers evoked for me:

"I am always surprised when people say, "Aren't you bored listening to people's problems all day?" My work is never boring. Every day, I am inspired by, and privileged to help foster, people's creative ability to solve problems, overcome adversity and rediscover their dreams." Dr. Barbara Lavi

Come back next week for the 2nd post from the Top 10 Words of Wisdom 2013 for the Top 5 Words of Wisdom posts from 2013.

Miraculous Mondays: Can Writing a Letter Save a Marriage?

Thought for the Day: Here's another segment in my Miraculous Monday's Therapy Moments from marital therapy. Last week, I completed a three part series (Psychotherapy: Miracle or Science: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3) describing a technique that I have used over the years and how it impacted on a couple struggling with marital conflicts. This week I will share a letter writing technique that has saved some marriages. Even when it does not save a marriage, it can shorten the painful process of deciding what to do when a marriage is failing. Do you think a letter could save a marriage? Has a letter helped you improve your relationship? I'd love to hear your stories as well.

There are some similarities between this intervention and the one I presented in the 1st set of articles on this subject. I use this technique when a couple has been coming for a while and do not seem to be making progress. In marriage counseling, I usually see some changes that indicate whether the differences can be reconciled within a couple of months. Although the marriage may not be fixed, there is an easing of differences, a lessening of quarreling and a return of some positive interactions between the partners. When I do not see this happening and the couple report either more of the same battles or an increase in discord, I begin to worry.

When this happens, I may give them a letter writing assignment. Shelly and Tom were in this type of holding pattern in their marriage. Tom had had a brief affair. When Shelly found out, she was devastated. If they did not have 3 children, Shelly said she would have left him immediately. She wanted to try to salvage the marriage, but could not stop thinking about Tom being with another woman. Tom was doing everything he could to try to make amends with Shelly. He was remorseful and apologized repeatedly to his wife. He broke off the affair, changed his cell phone number, so that there would be no contact, gave his facebook & e-mail passwords to Shelly so that she could check his correspondence whenever she wanted. He was calling Shelly and checking in on a frequent basis. Despite all his efforts, Shelly kept picking fights with him and questioning his honesty. I tried to help them understand that trust takes time to rebuild, but Shelly did not know if she could ever trust him again and kept threatening divorce.

I suggested that they write a letter to their spouse. They were to imagine that they got divorced tomorrow and that a year had gone by since they untied the knot. They were not to discuss their letters till the next therapy session. Come back next week to hear what happened when they returned.

Miraculous Monday's: Part 2: Psychotherapy Miracle or Science?

Thought for the Day: Last Monday, I began to tell the story of Henry and Linda's marital therapy. I introduced them and shared a question that I ask all clients at the beginning of therapy. Namely, "If a miracle happened and therapy cured you over night, how would you know? What would be different?"  Linda and Henry's visions of a miracle were pretty similar. They would be communicating with one another and laughing more. They would be living together in harmony and would see eye to eye on religious matters.    

       Since both Henry and Linda had mentioned problems in communication, I gave them a homework assignment. I encouraged them both to read the book, Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus by John Gray. I often assign reading to clients since it can speed up the process in therapy. In sessions, I can coach them in skills discussed in the book. I explained the theory behind the book and introduced the concepts men and women's different communication styles. 

       The next week, to my surprise only Henry had started reading the book. Often, men will delay starting a reading assignment and women will have completed the entire book. Linda had not had time. Although he had only read the 1st chapter, he liked it and could already see that it applied to their patterns of miscommunication.

       The couple's week had been slightly better, but they brought up an argument that had transpired which was typical of their disagreements. I decided to try a role-playing technique to attempt to get them to imagine interacting differently. They were each to direct the other partner in a two minute ideal scene. What would a perfect interaction between them look like. Henry wanted Linda to be the director first. Linda broke into tears. She said, " I don't think we could have even two minutes of an ideal relationship. It's just not possible." 

       When Henry began to contradict Linda and said, "Come on, we can get along for two minutes." I stopped him and got him to listen to his wife. I encouraged him to just find out what was making her feel so hopeless about their marriage. I reminded him about what he had read and he listened to her in a way he had never listened before. When she had completed what she wanted to say, he was able to ask if she wanted anything from him or if she just wanted him to listen. He said it saddened him to see her so upset and asked if he could do anything to help her. She asked him to just hold her and he did.   

      After he held her for a few touching moments, I decided to ask if they wanted to try the role play again. They were both able to act out their perfect 2 minute interaction. I didn't know for sure, but I felt I had just witnessed one of the miracle moments in therapy. Next week, in the third installment, I will share how Henry and Linda's week went and you can be the judge of whether psychotherapy is a science or a miracle or a combination of the two.

Miraculous Mondays: Psychotherapy: Miracle or Science?

Thought for the Day: As some of you know, I have been giving a lot of thought to the convergence of Chanukah & Thanksgiving lately (Saturday's Songs for the Soul: Chanukah Dayenu for a Good Cause and  David Letterman Style Top 10 SignsYou’re Holding the Perfect Chanukah Gift). What you don't know is that I have also been thinking about writing a new book. The new book idea and the thoughts about the holidays' meaning, like Chanukah & Thanksgiving collided for me this morning. My new book, which is still searching for a title, will share techniques I've used over the years that have helped clients heal broken marriages. Sometimes these techniques seem to work like miracles, surprising both me and the clients. Thinking about Chanukah & Thanksgiving alongside thoughts of therapeutic "miracles" brought me to questions about the convergence of art and science in psychotherapy. Psychology would like to seen as a pure evidence based science; however, the miraculous, creative, artistic side of psychology and psychotherapy is hard to quantify. How can emotions, like love, hope, anger and therapeutic changes be quantified? I went to a lecture this weekend called "The Truth, The Whole Truth and Nothing but The Truth," where the topic of miracles was discussed. A woman got up and announced she not only believed in miracles, she has learned to depend on them. She also disclosed that she was a recovered alcoholic who has learned to believe in herself, religion and miracles in AA. I am not a religious person and am more of a sceptic than this woman when it comes to miracles, however, there are times when clients come in a week after a therapeutic intervention & something has changed quite dramatically. Those are the moments I plan to report in this new book I am thinking about.

       Have you as a client or therapist experienced or observed one of these therapeutic miracles? If you have, I would love to hear from you. What happened? How do you explain the transformation that therapy helped make happen? 

Today, I'd like to start a series that will tell the story (edited to protect their privacy, but based on real people) of one couple's "miracle" in therapy. 

Here's the 1st installment:

       Nothing appeared to be working in Henry & Linda's marriage. Linda, an attractive, college educated woman grew up in a devout Catholic home. She was, however, a rebel who accepted some of the spiritual lessons & believes in God, but practices only parts of the religious dictates. So, you might call her a reform Catholic. She met Henry, who grew up in a totally nonobservant Catholic family on Match.com.

        After a fairly lengthy online courtship, followed by a long distance relationship, Henry and Linda spent time together and decided to get married. Linda was an independent creative professional who had managed both her own and other small restaurants. Henry, the first son of an Irish immigrant family to complete college is finishing specialized training in international law. When Linda became pregnant, she decided to stop working to care for their son. Although Linda loves being a mother, she misses the life of an independent working woman.

         Henry works full time and takes courses at night an Ivy League college. When he is home, he is constantly preparing for school. In addition, Henry has developed an interest in his Catholicism and attends church on weekends. Linda, on the other hand, has drifted away from her religious upbringing. Before they came for therapy, feeling lonely and craving some adult conversation, she started going out, meeting with both male and female single friends at night. She is not an alcoholic, but enjoys having a couple of drinks with friends. She has not gone to church for some time, has nothing to confess there and resents Henry pressuring her to go to church and confessional. Henry is anxious about her behavior, since she has been coming home late and they seem to be drifting apart.

     In initial sessions, I ask clients, "If a miracle happened and therapy cured you overnight, what would be different? How would you know that therapy had worked?" Later, I always tell them that therapy does not work overnight. With couples, I usually ask them to give therapy at least a few months to see if their marriage is getting better. If it is moving in the right direction, they will know whether they can fix the problems that brought them or not. Successful marital therapy does not always end in healing the marriage. Sometimes it helps people decide whether they should stay together or separate. At times, I am surprised by the outcomes. There are couples who could barely sit in the same room without screaming at one another who are living together in harmony; while other couples who seemed to have more rapport have been unable to work things out.

       If you'd like to hear more about what Henry and Linda thought their "miracle cure" would look like and about an intervention which made a significant difference, come back next week on Miraculous Monday. Have a great week.

If you would like to get a copy of my book, for 60% off and support menorah Park's D.R.E.A.M. Program click here.
        

Special Edition: Wake Up Washington: Part II Putting Congress On the Couch

Thought for the Day: I tend to be a serious person, however, when a humorous creative writing idea comes my way, I try not to let it pass. Therefore, today, I am writing a special edition for the blog. I hope you enjoy it & feel free to share it with whomever will appreciate the humor. Maybe it will help Wake Up Congress. As always, I'd love to hear your comments & ideas.

On Wednesday, I posted some comments on the need to "Wake Up" Washington DC & asked you for some therapeutic suggestions. Today, I'm offering a few treatment plans (tongue in cheek) to consider for Congress:

1) Psychoanalytic Treatment Plan: Put Congress on the couch. Address early childhood issues, Oedipal conflicts & wishes to get rid of paternal figures & have presidential power. Pros: it could get to the bottom of the causes for the neurotic behaviors. Cons: It would takes years of intensive psychotherapy & the nation would be in shambles before the treatment was completed.

2) Cognitive Behavioral Therapy: Develop a plan to overcome ObamaCare Phobia using progressive desensitization techniques. Teach members of Congress relaxation techniques & combine them with imagining a hierarchy of their fears of ObamaCare from the least to the most anxiety provoking.  Have them stay relaxed while imagining all the scenarios & they will be ready to move on. Pros: It could be completed in a few sessions. Cons: It might not get to the underlying issues causing the phobias.

3) Marriage Counseling &/or Family Therapy: Meet with members of congress to see if the marital rifts between the two sides can be resolved. Focus on enhancing communication skills & learning to compromise. Try to help the "parental figures" (congressmen & women) consider the needs of their children (citizens) even if they cannot resolve their differences. Mandate participation in a parenting class for divorcing parents for all members of congress. Get them into mediation to find solutions on how to keep the government running despite their differences. Pros: It could make them wake up & start behaving in a more adult ways. Cons: To do marriage counseling or mediation they must 1st be able to sit in the same room & start speaking to one another. It may not be possible at this time.

4) Addiction Intervention & Rehabilitation: Since Congress seems to be in denial of their addiction to "obstruction of the democratic process," an intervention may be necessary. All family members (citizens) who feel Congress' addiction is self destructive would meet with the interventionist prior to meeting with the addict. Family members would need to be prepared to tell Congress how their addiction is impacting them & the nation & the consequences if they do not get intensive treatment immediately. Before involving Congress a treatment facility & plan for rehab would be chosen. Pros: It may be the only way to break through Congress' denial of their addiction. Cons: The inpatient stay would bankrupt ObamaCare & recovery would take too long.

5) Treatment of Cult Victims: Treat members of Congress for brainwashing by cult like factions. Pros: It might actually help break the impasses in DC. Cons: Treatments for cult victims are controversial techniques. They cannot be carried out without cooperation of the brainwashed victims. Members of Congress would never cooperate.

I know there are therapists following this blog. Anyone have some additional suggestions?

Wake Up Wednesday: When Will Congress Wake Up & Stop Destroying Citizens' Dreams?

Thought for the Day: I have held my tongue since I try not to focus on politics. However, as the government shutdown drags on, I find myself wondering when will the politicians in Washington have a "wake up" moment & realize that without compromise everyone loses. It feel a bit like a game of Russian Roulette with the American people as the hostages whose lives & livelihood are endangered. The situation feels serious enough to warrant emergency action by the president, similar to presidential acts in the face of war or imminent threat of war. The financial implications of not raising the debt ceiling given the economic problems our nation is still struggling with are too serious to jeopardize the collapse of the economy. So many of my clients are already struggling with unemployment, fear of personal bankruptcy & the strain of financial challenges on their marriages & mental health, that I feel I must speak up. It feels as if Congress is simply blind to the struggles & feelings of the people back home. ObamaCare offers a ray of light to those under financial stress & is being implemented as I write, but Congress continues to try to undermine this initiative which they have not been able to stop in legal ways.  Too many American's lives & dreams depend on the continued improvement of the economy. One commentator on CNN today said that they feel we do not need specialists in hostage negotiations, but marriage counselors to try to save a nation on the path to a messy divorce. I'd be glad to try some family therapy techniques with members of Congress, if it would help them behave in a more mature fashion. What do you think? What will make Washington "wake up?"

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom: Dr. Lavi To Do Over or Do Nothing, That Is the Question

Thought for the Day: Wednesday's posts have been either Words of Wisdom or Wake Up Moments. Today's Words of Wisdom are mine & I hope they can also help people discover some wake up moments. Here's my words of wisdom: "It's better to do over than to do nothing." No one likes to have to do things over. It's frustrating to have to repeat a task you have already completed.
Here's a second quote and why doing something is better than doing nothing...

Flashback Monday & Tuesday: Life's Festival Goes On Rain or Shine With No Refunds for Unused Tickets

Thought for the Day: I have a very busy week & decided to repost this post for both Monday and Tuesday this week. I wrote it last September. Sometimes it's a good idea to look back & reflect. This post is well worth paying attention to more than once a year. Here's what I wrote back then:
 On Friday night I went to services. I do not go on a regular basis, but it was Yom Kippur, The Day of Atonement, which is the holiest day of the year for Jewish people. Originally, our plan was to go to services in Boston, but plans changed. Jerry, my partner, has been swamped in a new position in school. He was too tired to travel & we would have missed the Friday night service anyway. When a friend called & was planning to go in White Plains with her daughter, son-in-law & 4 month old grand son, I decided to join them. They were going to a service at Beit Am Shalom, a reconstructionist synagogue, which holds their services in a huge tent beside their building. They do not require tickets & only ask for a donation. They do not want anyone to avoid participation due to the high cost of membership. The service was beautiful. The music was both traditional & creative. The Rabbi & his wife, who is the Cantor (musical leader), add beautiful harmonies to the prayers. The entire congregation joined in. It was both welcoming & inspiring.

The service was a bit too long for our youngest group member. Therefore, unfortunately, I missed everything but the introduction to the sermon. The Rabbi spoke about being at a music festival at the end of the summer. The words on the ticket resonated with him in relation to the Day of Atonement. The tickets said that the gates to the venue would be open from 10 AM till 10 PM, that the concert would be held, Rain or Shine & there would be no refunds. He repeated those phrases a few times before I had to leave. The parallel to life, however, seemed fairly clear to me. We all get one ticket to the festival. The show goes on rain or shine for a limited time. The only difference is that we only know when the event gates open. No one knows the exact time that the gates will close on our lives. We can't get a refund or a second chance in life as far as we know.

     I don't know where the Rabbi took this message, but yesterday, while answering questions on HealthTap a few of the questions & answers I gave took on a different meaning when seen through the metaphor of life as a summer music festival. 

     A 27 year-old male on HealthTap asked:

        " I am anxious to the point I can't even leave my couch for more than daily needs. I'm so scared  about my health .1mg xanax won't even work?"
Read on to see how I answered him and two others who may be missing out on the festival of life;..