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Saturday, May 12, 2012

Mother's Day Part IV: If My Step-Mother Ruled the World

                                             Step-Mothers in Fairy Tales
Thought for the day: Step parents have gotten a bad rap in fairy tales & Disney movies for generations.  Cinderella was forced to clean the house for the entire blended family & not allowed to go to the ball. Snow White's wicked step-mother poisoned her & forced her to sleep till a prince awakened her with a kiss. It is no wonder that children of divorce have a hard time accepting step-mothers when they enter their fathers' lives. It's time for a new fairy tale, which I may write for children depicting a different kind of step-mother. Perhaps I will write one. Here's my story about a wonderful step-mother. I'd love to hear your stories, too.

I thought that my post yesterday was the last in a 3 part series (Part I, Part II, & Part III) but realized that I have 2 more posts which I need to include in this series. I decided to post this series in the timelines of most of my friends who are mothers. With the new facebook, I know that I often do not even see the posts of many friends & even family. I haven't figured out how to change that, but that is for another post! When I sent it to my step sister, I realized that I needed to write another post. I failed to give my step-mother, Noni Bogdanow, a voice in how she would change the world. Noni, who I called my "other mother" when I was an adult, would certainly want to speak up & be heard on this topic.

Noni entered my life when I was 13 years old. At the time, I kept a polite, but reserved tolerance for this new person in my father's life. I had a mother, was a teenager & believed I did not need any additional parenting figures. If I could turn back time, I would have found a way to be more open to Noni. As an adult, I realized that Noni became a bridge for me & my brothers to our father. Our visits with him became more pleasant & positive thanks to her wisdom, humor & patience. Noni was truly my second mother whom I called on Mother's Day for many years before she passed away.

So if my other mother ruled the world, she might teach children & step-mothers that we have room in our hearts for more than two people who love us & care about our lives. She would teach ways to wait patently for children to mature & realize that we all have room for multiple "dream" parents. She would also find a way to help children dealing with divorce laugh & discover the positive sides to what is never an easy situation.

Happy Mother's Day to the step-mothers in your lives.

Did a step-parent help you growing up or as an adult? I'd love, as always, to hear your stories.

There will be one more post in this series tomorrow, so please come back.
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