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Retreat Reviews: "I thought my dreaming days were over, but since leaving my teaching job, I have started a new career and my husband and I are exploring China for two years!! Dream Positioning works for both of us as we move forward together..." -Shulah S. Retreat Participant "My wife and I attended a retreat run by Dr. Lavi years ago. Things we learned still help us keep things exciting!" -Bill and JoAnn H., previous participant

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Tuesday's Psychology Tip & Wednesday's Words of Wisdom: Every Challenge in Life Is an Opportunity to Grow Don't Let Depression Blind You

Thought for the Day: I am again playing summertime catchup. Today's Psychology Tip is combined with some Words of Wisdom.

Every challenge in life Is an opportunity to grow: Don't let depression make you lose sight of the opportunity.

Depression is like a thief. It invades your body and drains the energy, joy and vitality from it's victims.

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Motivational Mondays: Yes You Can and Here's How

Thought for the Day: Political campaign slogans can make or break an election. The "Yes We Can" campaign and poster may have been the single most influential element in Barack Obama's presidential victory. It captured the attention of a nation weary of inaction and searching for hope for a better future. Whether the nation has seen the progress that they had hoped for is another question. In fact, the slogan may have in some ways backfired. People may have expected change to happen quickly.

As a psychologist, I know that change takes time. Although psychotherapy empowers people to overcome adversity and make changes in their lives, they need to be patient. Change takes hard work and perseverance if it is to become real and lasting. In a society which thrives on fast food restaurants, smart phones and computers with immediate answers at our fingertips, many people have lost hope on the political arena and "Yes We Can," may now feel like an empty promise. History and time will tell whether actual changes began to occur during this presidency. However, I can help you and clients with challenges facilitate change in their lives and the slogan for you to remember is: "Yes You Can."

Here's some advice on how you can, based on things I have learned over the years in my clinical practice...

Saturday, July 26, 2014

#FF Wonderful Weekend Review: Fabulous Finds from Psychology, Art, Music, Quotes & Comics Plus Delbert McClinton

I haven't posted on my blog for some time & decided to repost some of my older blog posts. Hope you have a great weekend & enjoy this weekend review:
Click Here to View the Magazine
Thought for the Day: Here's #FF Wonderful Weekend Review for your pleasure. There are some interesting articles to read about psychology, parenting, the impact of sleep on honesty, things you can do with your iphone and a touching way that social media helped a grieving stranger. In addition, to an TED video on how playing music impacts on the brain, a video of musical swings that light up, there are two music videos of new artists: Beyond The Veil - Lindsey Stirling, an amazing violinist (Original Song) & a song, My Silver Lining, by two sisters, First Aid Kit. There are more great comics, Gifs and quotes. Hope you enjoy the magazine & have a great weekend.

I'm not sure how to mix videos that I make into the magazine, but wanted to share some music from Wednesday night's Jazz Up July 2014 Delbert Mc Clinton concert in Stamford. The grammy award winning artist was wonderful. His backup band was equally phenomenal. The 1st piece is "Honey Can You Squeeze Me In," the 2nd is a xong called "Why Me," and the 3rd is a clip from Kevin McKendree, the keyboardist's new album. Excuse my poor clipping, but it gives you an idea of some great musicians to check out!

Thursday, July 24, 2014

Thursday's Psychology Trivia: What's the Unhappiest City in The USA & Why?

Thought for the Day: Long before the trend in positive psychology, I have always been fascinated in what leads to positive outcomes for people who have suffered from difficult life circumstances. My Master's thesis looked at what helped children cope with war, father absence and loss of a parent during war. At the time, psychology was entirely focused what causes psychopathology. Mine was one of the few studies which tried to figure out what leads to mental health. In recent years others have followed suit and today's psychology trivia question looks at a recent study's findings on how where we live impacts on our happiness. Here's the question:
   The most unhappy city in the United States is:

        a) Detroit MI
        b) Las Vegas NV
        c) Richmond VA
        d) New York NY 
        e) Pittsburg PA

What do you think, which of the cites above is the unhappiest in the United States?

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom: Can Mothers Bring Peace to the Middle East?

Thought for the Day: The war in the Middle East rages on and with each day the tragic loss of life increases. Pacifism and optimism don't seem to coexist in that area of the world. I am saddened by the senseless loss of life on both sides. I wish I had the answers that would end the conflict. The quote from above was first spoken in 1957 by Golda Meir, (1898 -1978), the 4th prime Minister of the State of Israel and the 3rd woman in the world to become a prime minister of any nation. She was a mother and grandmother who lead Israel into war with a heavy heart. Sadly. peace still eludes the region. Only two pieces of news this week gave me hope. 
     The 1st was an unprecedented announcement that the IDF, the Israeli Defense Force, opened a field hospital close to the border with Gaza, to offer treatment to Palestinian civilian casualties. In addition, they will be offering EMS services to women, children and the elderly needing medical treatment. Injuries requiring additional care will be transferred to Israeli hospitals.I commend their progressive attempts to let the civilian population know that they do not wish to harm them. Their issues are with Hamas.
     I believe that if the world ever learns to live in peace, it will be due to the efforts of mothers who will find creative ways to coexist for their children and their children's children's sake. I found the 2nd bit of news that gave a tiny ray of hope on Facebook. I added some images and share them as the 2nd words of wisdom for today. It is a prayer co-written by two mothers, Sheikha Ibtisam Mahameed, a Palestinian, and Rabba Elad-Appelbaum, an Israeli. I hope that their prayers will be answered...

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Tuesday's Psychology Tips: How To Get Rid of an Anxiety Disorder

Thought for the Day: Today is Tuesday. Which means it is time for Tuesday's Psychology Tips. A few days ago a question appear on HealthTap which brings the tip for today. The question was: How to get rid of an anxiety disorder without a therapist? Surely there  are many ways to reduce anxiety, but my reply was to ask, "Why wouldn't you consider psychotherapy?" Here's my answer with a bit more detail than I posted on HealthTap...

Monday, July 21, 2014

Motivational Monday: An Inspiring Video: Never Give Up

Thought for the Day: Today has been one of those frustrating Mondays. Last night I started a virus scan on my computer. It was not finished this morning and finally was completed this evening. Needless to say, all work on the computer was slow and tedious. The day was filled with clinical sessions with clients and a radio interview on the LA Bachelor Pad Talk Radio Show. The interview was on the violence in the sports world and why it is happening more and more lately. When it is posted on their site, I will post a link. At any rate, I just got to writing today's post. Earlier today I saw a very inspiring video on Facebook and decided to share it here today. It shows how a war veteran refused to accept his doctor's prognosis following his injuries in combat. Whenever, I hear stories like this one, I am even more motivated to work on all of my dreams. I hope it impacts on you the same way. Let me know what you think. I'd love to hear your stories of beating the odds as well. It could help motivate others...

Friday, July 18, 2014

#FF Wonderful Weekend Review: Mental Health, Parenting, Alzheimers, Songs4TheSoul, & Sunday's Comics

Click here to view the Magazine: 

Thought for the Day; Another week has seemed to fly by and it's time for my #FF Fabulous Finds for your weekend pleasure. It includes an eclectic mix of inspirational articles and a video about Psychology, Parenting, Fitness, Depression, How the Internet is changing medical research and saving lives interspersed with inspirational quotes. For Saturday's Songs for the Soul, there are two music videos (one from Lightnin' Hopkins, one of my all time favorites, Trouble in Mind, and a movie preview for Unbroken. Finally, there's Sunday's Comics. Don't miss the Tae Kwondo video.

Wednesday, I saw B.B. King live in Stamford CT. My iphone is overloaded with photos, so I was only able to shoot a very short clip from the performance. I'm sharing it since it was wonderful to see a jazz icon still performing at 89 years young. Thanks for all the years of amazing music!

Thursday, July 17, 2014

Thursday's Psychology Trivia: T or F Free Birth Control Is Linked To Promiscuity

Thought for the Day: It is Thursday and time for a Psychology Trivia question. As always, most of the answers to these questions are far from trivial. Yesterday, I had the opportunity to hear 89 year old B.B. King live at the Jazz Up July 2014 Series in Stamford CT. It was a pleasure to hear a jazz icon outdoors on a beautiful summer night. I hope you are enjoying the summer! Here's today's trivia question on what has been a controversial subject, free birth control for girls and women.

Trivia Question:

     True or False: Free birth control is linked to promiscuity

Read on to see the answer... 

Wednesday, July 16, 2014

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom: Life Doesn't Come With Blueprints

Thought for the Day: I have been working on redesigning my website for my clinical practice and really could use your help today. In the process of working on the redesign, I came up with an interesting logo. The logo design lead me to today's words of wisdom which will be included in the new logo. I'd love to know what you think of both the logo and the quote.
     For many years, I have used the name of the therapeutic approach that I have developed, ACT Now Psychotherapy, as the name of my private practice. The tagline: Active, Creative, Time-sensitive is based on the A.C.T. in the title and explains how my therapeutic approach works. The logo above triggered my imagination and led to a different tag line. Here's what happened...

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Tuesday's Psychology Tips: Ask Dr. B: How Can I Stop My Kids From Bickering?

Thought for the Day: On Tuesday's I have been posting psychology tips that usually tend to be short posts, today's will be a bit longer. Today, I received an e-mail from Shannon Philpott, Founder, The Single Mom's Playbook. She had some new questions for me to respond to from their "Ask the Expert" section. She told me that "reader questions are pouring in" lately and apologized for not notifying me when my posts were published in June. I decided to repost one of two questions I answered last June. It is longer than my usual tips, but I believe it could be helpful to single moms as well as to all parents. Here's the question:

question-mark1Dear Dr. B,        
As a single mom, I find myself frustrated easily when I get home from work and my children – 10 and 12 – fight me on every little thing. From homework to chores, the battles are endless. I’m trying to stay consistent with discipline, but it is so hard doing it alone. Do you have any suggestions?

Monday, July 14, 2014

Motivational Mondays: Why Motivation Is Grossly Overrated

Thought for the Day: As I began to think about today's post, I began to consider why people are often disappointed in their efforts to accomplish things in life. Discouraged when they fail to see results, they will say, "I have lost my motivation," and give up. With all the hype in our society surrounding motivation  it is not surprising that many people feel that all they need is to be motivated to achieve "success" in life. Do advertising slogans like, "Just Do It " and "Yes You Can," make people feel like failures when they have difficulty accomplishing their dreams in life. Bombarded by endless motivational quotes on posters and facebook pages and stories of young entrepreneurs who have sold start-up businesses for millions of dollars, it is not surprising that many people are feeling discouraged. Although I have been thinking and writing about motivation for many years as a psychologist and here on my blog, a recent experience led me to realize that motivation is grossly overrated. Read on to hear why and what you can do about it if it's not working for you.

Saturday, July 12, 2014

Wonderful Weekend Review: #FF Friday's Fabulous Finds, Saurday's Songs 4 the Soul & Sunday's Comics

Click here to view: Best on phone or ipad

Thought for the Day: Yesterday I was too busy to post and today I came up with an idea to try for the summer. I don't know about you, but when I am working during the summer, I like to have as much time as possible to get out and enjoy the weather. I decided to use the Flipboard technology to create a weekend magazine, instead of posting 3 separate posts for Friday, Saturday & Sunday. I shared some interesting articles to read on a variety of psychology, health and inspirational topics (including some TedTalks), some great photos, like the one on the cover of the magazine (Which is actually more beautiful with animation), an amazing musical video about an orchestra made up of instruments made from recycled garbage and how the music is enriching the lives of impoverished children and multiple comics and funny photos & videos. 

I tried to make it light and fun to read on your cell phones wherever the summer weather may take you! Let me know how you like this format & have a great weekend!

Thursday, July 10, 2014

Thursday's Psychology Trivia: True or False: Eating Cheese Before Bed Causes Nightmares

Will Cheese go to your head & lead to Nightmares?
Thought for the Day: I was too busy to post yesterday. but am back on track today. Summer time is a bit tricky and I may post a bit more infrequently, but stay tuned. It's Thursday and time for a psychology trivia question. What do you think?
True or False: Eating cheese before going to bed causes nightmares

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

Tuesday's Psychology Tips: There Are No Failures In Life, If...

Thought for the Day: It's Tuesday and time for me to share another psychology tip. I have been writing a lot of tips for HealthTap lately and this one was to help people improve self esteem. "There are no failures in life, if you learn from your mistakes." It is all too easy to let mistakes make us feel like failures.

Monday, July 7, 2014

Motivational Mondays: Will Middle East Tragedy Bring Peace & Reconciliation or Retribution?

Thought for the Day: Sometimes, even psychologists remain silent when they are upset. This has been the case for me regarding the events over the past weeks in the Middle East. First, I was shocked and saddened by the kidnapping, search for and finally the discovery of the murder of three young teenagers in Israel. I had no words and avoided speaking about it on my blog. Then, words failed me again as I was disgusted to hear of the murder of a Palestinian teen in an apparent act of retribution. I feared an escalation of acts of retributions. Two wrongs never make a right, they simply lead to more and more wrongs. Those of you who follow my blog know that I am essentially a pacifist doing what ever I can to advocate for a more peaceful world with sensible gun control. When I hear of senseless murder of children, even I have trouble finding the right words.

Today, I noticed an article that gave me a sense of hope in the midst of the terrible most recent tragedies that have happened in the Middle East. Instead of retribution, it was the story of Palestinians and Jewish mourners consoling one another. Can tragedy motivate people to find ways to reach peace?

Sunday, July 6, 2014

Sunday's Comic Strips: Soy Milk, Alphabet of Obsolete Words, Mood Poisoning, 4th of July & More

Thought for the Day: Just an observation, I noticed that there were not many funny posts this weekend. Somehow the 4th of July gives us all pause to think about more serious things like patriotism, war and sacrifice. I was able to fine some funny images to share with you. I will put one below so that you can take in all the obsolete words. Enjoy!

A big shout out and thank you to my Facebook and g+ friends for today's comics. I really appreciate the wonderful finds that bring smiles to all: Facebook Friend Ray William Johnson for Soy Milk, +kl├íra velez   Kid & Cat,  +Daniel Draper  Sea 2 Shining Sea, +Herb Firestone  & wrong hands for Alphabet of Obsolete Words, +David John  for Forgiveness & Peace, and +Kimberly Stuart for Romantic Comedy, Housework, Mood Poisoning, & Bed = Magical Place

Friday, July 4, 2014

#FF Friday's Fabulous Finds: 4th of July Recipes & Deals, Strike Out #ALS, Soccer Salsa, Habit Change & More

Thought for the Day: In honor of the Fourth of July today's finds include

4th of July Recipes & 15 Great 4th of July Deals, Strike Out ALS, Soccer Salsa, an article on Habit Change, Great Photos, Gun Free Target

Hope you enjoy the long weekend!

Thursday, July 3, 2014

Thursday's Psychology Trivia: Do "Cool" Teens Turn Into "Cool" Adults?

Thought for the Day: Did you want to be a "cool" kid when you were 13 - 15 years old? Did you envy the kids who were seen as popular, more mature and a bit rebellious? You remember them, the kids who would sneak into a movie or commit other minor acts of rebellion to impress their peers and wanted to be popular and physically attractive more than anything else. If you were't in the "in crowd," do you ever wonder how the "cool" kids turned out? Today's trivia question addresses what happens to "cool" young teenagers as they mature. Here's the question:

Young teenagers (aged 13 to 15) who are "cool; " i.e., want to be popular and try to impress their peers by acting older than their years, 
       a) tend to be popular in their early teens       
       b) remain cool throughout adolescence
       c) do well in early adulthood
       d) lose popularity later in adolescence
       e) are at risk for alcohol and drug problems, more serious criminal activity, and problems in 
           romantic relationships in their 20's
       f) a), b) & c)

       g) a), d) & e)

What do you think the answer is? Read on to see...

Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Wednesday's Words of Wisdom: The Cure for Summertime Blues Is to Turn Every Day Into a Staycation

Thought for the Day: It is summertime and unlike the words of the song, the living is not always easy. Some people are feeling stressed and depressed. They may be are out of work, having trouble selling their homes or can't afford to go on vacation. Seeing others going on vacation may make them feel the summertime blues. I was fortunate enough to take a few days off from Friday till Monday evening this week. It was wonderful spending time at the beach and exploring the Hamptons. (It lead to my not posting on Monday and Tuesday, but it was a great getaway.) People who own condos there were reporting that businesses are not doing very well this summer. Restaurants are not as busy and even the traffic is a bit less than in previous years. If this is the case in one of the wealthiest areas of the country, my guess is that the economy is impacting on families across the nation. So my words of wisdom today are:

          The cure for summertime blues is to turn every day into a Staycation. 

There are many ways to have a great summer without spending a fortune.