Thought for the Day: I am starting a new series of post. Each will include a number of questions. I hope you will share your thoughts and comments to enrich the learning that can result from posts like the one which stimulated the current series. I look forward to your thoughts and comments as I explore a new format for the blog. Thanks in advance for your help!
When I first posted the question: If you could write a note to your younger self what would you say in only two words? I never imagined where the results would lead me. The question fascinated me from the moment I read it. Although I had my own response, I held my tongue since I wanted to hear what the people who follow my blog would say. The responses flowed in from across social networks. There were multiple responses from groups on Google+, responses on Facebook, Quora, Tumblr and therapists from a LinkedIn group responded with insightful comments. Although I have over 10,000 twitter followers, I’m unsure why no one tweeted any 2 word advice. As the two word notes to people’s younger selves came in, I began to ask for additional information. How old were they now? When did they realize that these 2 words of advice were important to them? Why did they choose these two words? When people replied the stories behind the notes were fascinating.
To make sense of the results, I began to put the responses into 6 categories. The categories have a great deal of overlap. At times I was simply guessing as to where the responses belonged since not all people shared their back stories. I did my best to group them together and tried to make sense of what they could teach about gaining insight and wisdom. Using these groupings, I’d like to start to describe what these words of advice mean and how they might help people at any point in their lives.
First let me say that I think the task reflects how people grapple with growing up. It also reflects what I have called the challenge of learning to become one’s own “dream parent.” We have two parents. Most do the best they can to help their children become productive members of society and live good lives, but parents are not perfect. Very few of us are lucky enough to have what I call “dream parents” in my book. However, in addition to our parents, we may have encountered some parenting figures along the way who have helped us cope with life challenges. A “dream parent” can be the combination of our parents, an aunts or uncles, neighbors, coaches or teachers who helped us along the way. These two word messages are signs of what we have learned about self parenting ourselves as adults.
Some people who responded to the questions felt that developing wisdom takes a long time. They see age and experience as necessary to acquire what it takes to offer good advice to their younger selves. I preferred to keep an open mind without preconceived notions of what allows one to gain wisdom. I wanted to find out how and at what age they learned the advice. I also wanted to see whether people developed insights to share with their younger selves or not. The findings may surprise you. Read on to hear more about what your responses have taught me and some additional questions they have raised for me...
