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Thursday, January 12, 2012

Warning: 5 Signs You May Be Undermining Your Own Dreams


Thought for the day: "The best angle from which to approach any problem is the 'Try-angle.' " Unknown
"The 'Try-angle' approach to problem solving must be followed by the 'Try-try-again angle.' " Dr. Barbara Lavi
     In my work with clients helping them to accomplish their dreams, I began to discover several types of impediments causing their dreams to be bottled up & unfulfilled. This led me to develop the Dream Quotient Questionnaire (TM), a self assessment tool which produces a Dream Quotient (DQ). Much like an IQ score, the DQ score reveals an individual's dream potential. It differs from IQ which remains fairly constant throughout a person's life. A DQ score can change since there are ways to strengthen & enhance dream potential.
     Briefly, these are the 5 warning signs that you may be undermining your dreams:
           1) You question your ability to accomplish the new tasks;
           2) You think you are too old to start working towards a dream;
           3) You see too many challenges or physical restrictions in your way;
           4)  Financial restraints stop you from even trying; &
           5)  No one else in your family ever did it, so you think you can't.
     Have you ever felt this way about your dreams? Do you question your ability to accomplish your aspirations? These are signs that you may be undermining your ability to reach your dreams. We all have doubts from time to time about our abilities; however, if you identify with these warning signs & frequently find that you stop yourself from trying to reach your dreams, you may need some help. Fortunately,  there are ways to overcome these issues & learn how to start using the "Try-angle" & "Try-try-again Angle" instead of blocking your dreams.
      In subsequent posts, things you can do to correct these problems will be addressed. If you'd like my help, share your challenges here & I will share some potential solutions & ways I have helped clients overcome these warning signs.

4 comments:

Melissa said...

These are wonderful ways to keep myself in check as far as undermining my dreams, because I am guilty of making up excuses as to why I will never accomplish my dream of writing a novel. There are so many people out there who openly doubt writers, but I have managed to find a great community of writers at my school who keep me motivated.
My question for you, Dr. Lavi, is how I can stay motivated with my creative writing when other responsibilities pop up. Many times, I feel completely motivated and energized for the first week or so of writing, but then school work piles up and then work from jobs over breaks piles up too, weighing me down and forcing me to put my writing on the back burner. Do you have any suggestions?

Barbara Lavi said...

Hi Missy,
First be kind to yourself, creativity does not stay at a constant level. It goes in ebbs & flows & life sometimes does get in the way of writing. Different writers solve this in different ways. One way is to find a time of day that works well for you & make a writing date with yourself. I find that early morning is the best time for me when the rest of life has not gotten in the way yet. Another technique is to keep a small notebook & write down ideas as they come to you for when you have time to write. Steve Seskin, hit soongwriter & teacher of songwriting, talks about "input" versus "output" times for creative people. Sometimes you are experiencing things on input mode before you are ready to write about it during output mode. Life & all it's challenges can lead to ideas for your novel. So, make time to write as often as you can & use your life as inspiration. Hope that helps! Feel free to ask more! DrB

Melissa said...

That's true - any writing is better than no writing at all. I do scribble observations in my notebooks and my planner occasionally while at school, but I'll try to remember to bring a little notebook just for observations so I can keep them all in one place and feel more inclined to write while I'm out and about during the day. Thank you, Dr. Lavi! It's always nice to talk to a fellow writer.

Barbara Lavi said...

Keep writing! Missy! DrB